Simple Squares

Another day, another brand of snack bar to review.

"Clean energy and made with only 5 ingredients, SIMPLE is perfect for CrossFit, workouts, travel, meal replacement"

Simple Squares are yet another non-gmo, paleo, gluten-free, organic, kosher, etc bar.  No dairy, soy, wheat, gluten, refined sugars.  The name is straightforward: simple ingredients, and, unlike most products of the kind, they are squares, rather than rectangles.  They come in 8 varieties.

Chili Pep.

"The zest and zing of Chili Pepper provides numerous benefits to the body. Chili Pep delivers a punch of flavor to your taste buds and goodness to your heart."

I went for the one that sounded like a flavor punch: Chili Pep.

The ingredients list really is simple foods: cashews, almonds, honey, unsweetened coconut, chili pepper, sea salt, and vanilla extract.  I count 7 ingredients, even though their marketing boasts 5.  I guess salt and vanilla don't count?  Regardless, there are indeed no strange chemicals, no isolates, and no fillers.

The bar, er, square, tastes about like what you'd expect from these ingredients.  Slightly sweetened nuts, a bit of coconut, and a zing of heat on the finish.  The nuts are all tiny little chunks, as is the coconut.  You can't easily distinguish any particular bits, but you don't need to.

Does it taste amazing?  Nah.  But it is good?  Yes.  Simple, but yes.  Rather than munching on a bag of nuts, you can munch on this instead, and at least it is a bit more interesting.  It reminded me slightly of baklava filling, which really doesn't make sense since there is no pistachio and it is spiced, but I think I don't have many other "tiny chopped sweetened nuts" items that come to mind.

I easily finished my bar, and I'd like to try others.

****.

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Nonni's Biscotti

While I am an avid lover of desserts and most baked goods, cookies, and cookie-like things, are usually pretty low on my list (one notable exception being the totally crazypants delicious Salted Caramel Manifesto cookies from Sweet Street!).  Biscotti, in particular, absolutely not something I generally care for.  That said, every once in a while, when I have a really high quality Americano or long black, with a perfect crema on top ... I just love to have a biscotti to dunk into it.

"Our delicious array of products has something for everyone. From traditional tastes to modern interpretations of timeless classics, everything has been made with you in mind. So, make time for yourself to indulge in a crunchy biscotti paired with a warm cup of coffee for dipping. You deserve it."

Nonni's Biscotti is a fairly common brand biscotti carried at coffee shops that do not make their own.  In addition to classic original almond biscotti and a chocolate dipped version, they also make a slew of others: fig almond, cinnamon streusel, limone, turtle pecan, dark chocolate almond, toffee almond, salted caramel, triple chocolate ... and then some seasonals like pumpkin spice (sigh) and gingerbread.  All the biscotti.  

"All it takes is one crunch to fall in love

Our original biscotti recipe isn’t just full of tradition, it’s rich with family history. It was brought to the shores of America by our own Nonni (grandmother) who spent years perfecting her biscotti in the small town of Lucca, Italy. We’re still following that recipe today and proud to carry on the delicious heritage."

Nonni's is based in ... Tulsa, Oklahoma.  You know, the land of biscotti?  Yeah, #random.  Not sure how authentic this is, but, they are a dominant player in the packaged biscotti market.  The parent company also makes "THINaddictives", a sorta hybrid cracker-biscotti, and another line of biscotti, "La Dolce Vita".  I've only tried the basic Nonni's branded biscotti. 

Originali Biscotti.

"An almond biscotti with just a hint of Anise.  This classic creation is rich in Tuscan tradition and is an excellent complement to a cup of coffee, espresso, or wine."

I didn't find this basic almond biscotti notable in any way.  It had bits of almond.  It was crisp.  It was biscotti.  No more, no less.

***.

Triple Milk Chocolate Biscotti: 

“A rich cocoa biscotti filled with semi-sweet chocolate chunks, dipped in and topped with ribbons of luscious milk chocolate - all the chocolate you love in a light, crunchy cookie. Perfect with coffee, cappuccino, or cold milk.”  

Looking for something totally different, I tried the triple chocolate version - it had not only a chocolate base and chocolate dip, but also chocolate chunks inside.

The biscuit base was very cocoa-y, but not very chocolate-y, if that makes sense.  I was not a big fan of hte base flavor. There were not many chocolate chocolates.  And the coating was pretty boring, not very flavorful.

So somehow, 3 kinds of chocolate, and it still tasted like ... not much.  Eh. Not for me.

**.

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Haig's Delicacies

If you live in the Bay Area, and have ever browsed the pre-made Mediterranean foods section of the grocery store, you'll likely recognize the name Haig's.

"THE ORIGINAL & THE BEST SINCE 1956."

Haig's Delicacies is a San Francisco based Armenian snack food producer that started as a store in the Richmond in the 1950's, but now they produce ready made foods for grocery distribution, along with wholesale.  Every product they make is not only vegetarian, but many are also vegan.

The product lines make up "artisinal mezés", including assorted dips, bites like falafel, salads, and easy packaged dip + cracker "mini mezés".

Salads

"Mix up your own authentic Mediterranean meal with our savory salads. Each one is crafted from scratch daily in California so you’ll get delicious, fresh-as-can-be flavor in every bite. Just toss and serve. Great for lunch at work, an afternoon snack, or a quick dinner side."

For an easy toss together and serve option, Haig's has a few layered salads, including a couscous with almonds, currants, and more, a cracked wheat version with peppers, tomatoes, and peas, and the more common taboule. 

Mix & Serve Taboule Salad.

"Mix up your own authentic Mediterranean lunch! Bright green parsley, mild green onion, ripe tomatoes and crisp cucumbers balance the satisfying nuttiness of bulgur wheat. Add olive oil dressing, shake, and devour!"

The taboule was a 2013 Specialty Food Association's sofi™ Awards Finalist for Outstanding New Product.

The salad is layered, with a base of bulgur, topped with cubed cucumber and tomato, tons of parsley, with the dressing in a separate container, to best preserve freshness.  It is designed to all be mixed together once you are ready to consume.

I didn't care for this at all.  I really don't understand how this works well as a packaged product, as little cubes of tomato and cucumber dry out very quickly, and the shelf life on this was several weeks.  As expected, the veggies weren't fresh or crisp, and they are a pretty important part of taboule.  The herbs weren't bad, and the bulgur was standard bulgur, but ... yeah, no.

Also strange is the dressing.  The package clearly says it is to be kept refrigerated, but the dressing congealed and was a solid mass, making it impossible to mix together.

I don't really understand how they won the award, nor how this product is even a good idea for the market ...  I obviously wouldn't get again.  Sold at my local Whole Foods for $5.95, which seems very high, even though it was a large salad.

*+.

Meze Bites

"Keep a few stocked in the fridge for lunch, or pick up a bunch, and you’ve just catered a party yourself with dishes your guests will rave about. Our authentic small-plate bites are made by hand daily right here in California with the freshest, simplest ingredients possible."

 The "bites" lineup is little snacks or supplements to meals, and has the expected falafel and dolmas, plus some veggie fritters.

Dolmas.

"Our zesty and succulent dolmas are lovingly hand-wrapped with tender grape leaves, and stuffed with a lively blend of rice, onions, lemon juice, herbs, and spices."

Wow these were oily.  So oily.  Picking one up left my fingers coated in oil.  Biting into one left my mouth coated in oil.  It is all I tasted.  And amusing, since the description never mentions oil.

The grape leaves were fine, tender.  The filling was seasoned, but very mushy.  They were well rolled.  But overall, this was just a oily, soggy mess, and I didn't like them.

**.

Dips & Spreads

"At our house, you’ll often find friends and family gathered around a long table filled with mezés, or “small plates.” The dips and spreads we craft for you are made with the same recipes we use in our kitchens at home, and each one has the same big, authentic flavor that’s perfect for sharing with the people you love."

Haig's is known for their array of dips and spreads, including many varieties of hummus, but also a number of other dips, many labne based.  They offer a few organic versions as well.

Baba Gannouge: 

"Rich, smoky undertones bloom on your palate in this flavorful mezé of roasted eggplants and tahini, with a hint of zesty lemon, garlic, and spices."  

The first I tried was the baba gannouge, always one of my favorite Mediterranean dips.

It was decent.  I liked the additional burst of brightness from the lemon and the garlic was present but not too strong.  But, I didn't really taste eggplant, which is generally what I'm going for when I pick baba gannouge.  Not bad, but not particularly good.

***+.

Tzatziki: 

"Our family recipe is the basis for this refreshing mezé of extra thick and creamy Greek yogurt brightened with a splash of red wine vinegar and garlic, and speckled throughout with fresh, crisp cucumbers and fragrant dill."

Next, tzatzki.  Now, this was very good!  It had some serious tang from the yogurt base, but also the vinegar and lemon juice.  The dill flavor was strong, the cucumbers surprisingly crispy for a packaged product.   Highly recommended.

****.

Muhammara: 

"Our savory blend of tangy pomegranates and roasted red peppers mix with ground walnuts and our unique blend of spices to create this nutty and irresistibly exotic spread." 

And lastly, one that sounded the most complex, muhammara.

This was only ok.  The ground nuts added a bit of crunch, and it wasn't too sweet from the pomegranate, but it had the taste of a packaged good, if that makes any sense.  Just, not fresh, slightly plastic-y.

***.

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Emmi

Emmi is the largest Swiss milk processor, and the maker of dairy goods distributed throughout Europe and a number of other countries.  The dairy coop has been around since the early 1900s, but the brand was not established until the 1940s.  Today, they make many different product lines, mostly yogurt and cheese based.

I haven't ever seen Emmi in the United States, but when visiting my Paris and London offices, they were commonplace, and so I had a chance to try a few items.  Other countries really do yogurt so much better than us ... full fat, it just makes a difference.

Suisse Yogourt: Nature.

"The term “Nature” provides the answer: no additional ingredients are added beyond those required for a natural product."

The first item I tried was their plain, natural, yogurt.

It was extremely smooth, no lumps, no clumps.  Quite creamy.  It was not sweetened in any way, yet it had no tang like a Greek yogurt. 

This was good, particularly for plain yogurt, but not amazing.

***+.

Yogourtpur Baeis.

"Emmi Jogurtpur is a stirred yogurt that is produced without additives and contains only three ingredients: yogurt made from Swiss milk, specially selected fruit and sugar. Jogurtpur meets the need for pure, natural products."

Next up, from the "Yogourtpur" line of yogurts made with only a few ingredients, I went for the berry flavor (baeis).

It too was beautifully creamy, clearly full fat yogurt, decadent.   I loved the berry flavor, a mix of blueberry, raspberry, blackberry.  It tasted like real fruit, naturally sweet, not artificial.  Minus one point though as it had blackberry seeds in it, which I didn't care for (so gritty!).

Still, far above average for a fruity yogurt, and puts American yogurt to shame.  ***+.

Chai Latte: Original Taste.

"The difference is what's inside. That's why we've only selected simple and high-quality ingredients for our Emmi CAFFÈ LATTE products."

The last item I tried was a pre-made chai latte.  Yup, ready-to-drink, in a cup that looked like it came from a cafe.  Emmi makes an entire product line of different latte products (mostly coffee based).

It was way, way too sweet.  The chai spice flavors good, but, just way too sweet.  I did really love the packaging though!

**** for packaging and spicing, but sadly, **+ overall.

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