Wednesday, November 07, 2018

Boss Lady Pizza, Boulder, CO

Another year, another pizza party for "Hackathon" night at our annual work conference.  Last year's event was in Kirkland, WA with the excellent wild mushroom pizza from Pagliacci's.  This year, we were in Boulder, CO, and the organizer selected Boss Lady Pizza, a pizza place highly recommended by the local admins.

Boss Lady is not your standard pizza place.  Sure, you *could* just build your own simple, normal size and topped pizza.  But their menu is all about ridiculous toppings and featured recipes.  And that menu is HUGE.  For red pies, e.g. marinara base, there are 10 different pre-designed offerings, including taco inspired ones with sour cream swirled on top.  Things get far more interesting with the white pies, nearly 20 (!) offerings, and they are absolutely fascinating, bohbotht in names, and in ingredients.  White base here means ranch, or garlic & olive oil, or creme fraiche (!), or alfredo sauce.  And the recipes?  Things like the "Bad Mother Clucker", a ranch base with spicy breaded chicken, jalapeno, and cayenne, or the Mushroom Penne Alfredo ... yes with penne on it.  Or, uh, options like the Baked Po-TOT-o, featuring ... tator tots (and bacon, cheddar, creme fraiche, sour cream, chives, and butter).  I think you get the idea.  Next up?  BBQ pies, 8 options with bbq sauce as the base, including crazy combinations involving tater tots, or even the Mac Daddy, yes, with macaroni, mozzarella, cheddar, fried onions, and honey (?!).  Then pesto pies (6 choices), vegan pies (3), and build-your-own pies, with endless combinations.  Our group had some from every category.

They also make salads (bo-ring, but we got some), and wonderful sounding desserts (sweet pizzas like a Cookie Monster with cream cheese icing, chocolate chips, chocolate chip cookie dough globs, mozzarella, and chocolate sauce, or a S'mores pizza, or homemade chocolate lava cake, or ... Sinna Sticks, cinnamon sugar coated sticks with sides of icing.  Alas, we didn't have any dessert.

I think Boss Lady likely is actually really good.  But ... our event didn't exactly do it justice.  First, the pizza was all cold.  I'm not sure if this was a delivery problem, if it was ordered for early delivery just to be safe, etc, but, cold pizza is only appealing to me at breakfast.  I tried microwaving some, but that just resulted in soggy pizza.  I was sad, because, again, I think this actually was decent pizza.  Last year's event shocked me by having hot fresh pizza, and I was hoping we'd replicate that experience.  And second, I knew what amazing options were on the menu, and, besides one of them (spoiler: it involves waffles!), we didn't have them.

I don't feel entirely justified in reviewing Boss Lady on these grounds, so I'll just give the caveat that the menu was not my selection, and, the pizza was seemingly not fresh.  If I was in Boulder again, and randomly wanted pizza, I'd be willing to try it again, but, uh, pizza is never high on my list.
Caesar.
"Romaine, parmesan, hardboiled egg, crouton, house-made caesar dressing."

Our event organizer made sure to provide some vegetables too, with giant catering pans of salads.

First up, the Caesar.  Caesar is one salad I do actually sometimes like.  But this Caesar was not my style.  The base was romaine, as expected, but it was mostly the outer darker leaves, not the hearts.  I prefer the juicy hearts.  It had croutons, also as expected, but they were just generic rock solid hard kinda stale croutons.  I was hoping that a pizza place might at least have pizza dough croutons!  It also had ... hard boiled egg?  And a sprinkle of parmesan cheese, the grated kind.  I prefer large shards of sharp aged parmesan.

The dressing was decent though, loaded with parmesan, although I don't think it had anchovy.

Overall, generic, lackluster salad.
Mixer.
"Mixed greens, cucumber, tomato, red onion, dried cranberries, house-made balsamic dressing."

Next was the "Mixer" salad, basic mixed greens with a slew of toppings that made no sense together.  Cucumbers and tomatoes, sure.  Onions too.  But dried cranberries?

The cucumbers were slices, rather watery, not interesting.  Red onion was fine.  I hated the dried cranberries, hard little pellets.  The tomato was super strange, not cherry nor grape tomatoes, not cut into wedges, but rather ... slices like you'd get on a burger.  But on top the salad.  And really, really, really mushy.

This was not a good salad.  I didn't try the balsamic dressing on the side.
White Pie: Chicken & Waffles. $28.
"Crème fraîche, mozzarella, house-breaded chicken, waffles, maple syrup, melted butter."

For my first slice, I had to go straight for ... the chicken & waffles.  Sure, I loathe chicken, but, waffles!

Uh, yeah.  This pizza had a creme fraiche base (that I didn't really taste, I think it mostly soaked into the crust), mozzarella cheese (standard, well coated, melted), chunks of fried breaded chicken (oily, dried out, not good), chunks of waffles (sadly Eggo caliber, spongy), and was drizzled with maple syrup (yup, a kinda sweet pizza).  The menu says there was melted butter on top somewhere too.

I think this pizza suffered the most from being cold.  Cold soggy waffles.  How appealing is that?  Cold soggy waffles, on a rather dry pizza since it was essentially sauceless, with dried out overcooked chicken bits.  A fun concept, perhaps tasty, and I think a great mix of ingredients, but not enjoyable as it was served.  I love the idea of the sweet and savory pie though.

Our pizzas were all the large 20" size, which resulted in monster slices.  Most of us lamented this, as we wanted to try several types of pizza (I think we had 10 kinds?), but a single slice was a meal in itself, and there were no knives to cut them in half.  But since I truly didn't like this one, I went for another slice (don't worry, we had far more pizza than we needed).
White Pie: Spinach Artichoke Dip. $30.
"Alfredo sauce, spinach, artichoke, fresh garlic, mozzarella, asiago, BLP seasoning."

I have no idea why I picked the spinach artichoke dip pizza, since I don't actually like artichokes, but it was the hands down winner.  I truly wish I could have had this one hot and fresh.

The pizza was sauced with Alfredo, which worked better than the creme fraiche, not quite as lost.  A rich creamy base, then loaded with nicely laid out spinach, soft artichoke, and tons of garlic.  Oooh the garlic.  This pizza was all about the lovely garlic.  The mozzarella was fairly standard, but the asiago was a nice touch with the spinach and garlic.

The crust however was pretty meh, chewy, lackluster, although, again, perhaps that is an freshness thing.

I did really enjoy the flavor and potential to this one, so much so that I dared try to microwave it (and I'm *not* a microwaver!), but, alas, it got really really soggy, and I had to discard it.
Red Pie: Garden. $26.
"Marinara, mozzarella, roasted red pepper, fresh portobello mushroom, fresh spinach, olive oil, BLP seasoning."

Finally, as I was leaving, and there were still many, many full pies left, I decided to grab a slice of just one more, and went totally classic and all in with the Surpreme.  Loaded with everything, red sauce and mozzarella base.  I circled back to snap a photo, and, uh, just realized I took the wrong one.  Sorry, this here is a Garden pizza, a veggie one loaded up, that I didn't try.

[ No Photo ]
Red Pie: Supreme. $30
"Marinara, mozzarella, sausage, pepperoni, green pepper, red onion, fresh portobello mushroom."

The crust, sauce, and cheese were all eh (again, chewy crust, sauce I didn't quite care for, and eh to just mozzarella), but the toppings were good, and quite generous.  I liked the crunch from the peppers and onions, the pepperoni wasn't too oily, and I actually really liked the sausage.

I sorta wish I had taken the offer to take some back to the hotel, as this is exactly the type of pizza that would make a great breakfast slice.
Dips: Marinara / Ranch / Bossy Sauce.
I was really excited when I saw that there was a condiments section for the pizza.  Standard packets of parmesan and red pepper flakes, and ... sauces!  I eagerly grabbed one of each.

The marinara was the same as used in the pizza, and it was just far too ... marinara-y for me.  I don't how to describe it other than that it was just too tomato heavy, too tangy, too sweet.  Just everything out of balance.  I didn't like it at all.

The ranch was equally not enjoyable, literally flavorless.  I don't understand how they made such a boring ranch.

And the "Bossy Sauce", which I was really looking forward to, some kind of creamy signature sauce, turned out to be ... chipotle ranch.  Doh.  I don't like chipotle, and this was no exception, just a flavor I truly don't enjoy.

So sadly, I didn't like any of these sauces, which I guess is fine, as I didn't really want to dip my crusts in them anyway, since the crust was chewy and cold.
Boss Lady Pizza Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

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