Hu Snacks

Thank you, JetBlue.

Thank you for introducing me to Hu, a brand I likely wouldn't have discovered on my own, but now regularly crave and seek out.  Hu makes a variety of chocolate products: milk or dark chocolate bars, baking gems, and chocolate covered things (hunks).  The products are all gluten-free, keto, paleo, etc.  All organic, fair trade when possible.  No refined sugars. Vegan besides the milk chocolates.

Bag of Hu!

I've only had one of their products, the parting gift given on JetBlue Mint flights, but I really adore them, and would gladly try more of their products.  (They usually give you just one bag, but, uh, my flight attendant really hooked me up when I said how much I loved them!).

Dark Chocolate Hunks

"Chocolate covered and ready for snacking."

Hunks are just the brand name for (dark) chocolate covered things.  They are available in only 3 varieties: almonds + sea salt, sour goldenberries, and cashews + vanilla bean.  Pretty simple concept that is done a zillion times over.  Chocolate covered nuts and dried fruit.  Yup, been there, seen that.  Or at least, that is what I thought, until I tried these.

I've only had one kind of Hunks, but I found them exceptional.  Yes, they still *are* just chocolate covered nuts, but they are done very, very well.

Cashews + Vanilla Bean.

"Think of Hunks as the perfect marriage between our signature 70% dark chocolate — the same we use in our Simple Dark Chocolate Bars — and organic nuts."

Yes, the product I'm raving about is just chocolate covered cashews.  And while I like cashews, I certainly don't generally get excited about them, chocolate covered or not.  But these I get excited about.

The ingredients are pretty simple: cashews, cacao, cocoa butter, coconut sugar, salt, vanilla bean.  No palm oil used in the chocolate coating, which makes them less shiny that most other brands. The coconut sugar used to sweeten is unrefined.  Simple.  Just basic chocolate covered nuts.  They shouldn't be special right?

But they are so good!  The chocolate coating is less creamy and shiny compared to traditional chocolate covered items, and the layer isn't particularly thick, which all sounds like it would be a negative, but actually, allows the quality of the dark chocolate and the nut itself to really shine.  The chocolate is deep, dark, and intense, and not too sweet.  The nut is nicely roasted, tastes quite fresh.  The touch of sea salt makes them pop.

These are just really quite good.  Not much more to say than that.  A great snack, a nice little treat to sneak alongside my breakfast, likely great paired with red wine too.  Love them.  ****+.

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Dominique Ansel Workshop

One of my first visits to New York, I visited Domnique Ansel Kitchen on my last day, not to try the oh-so-famous cronut, but rather, the DKA.  I was going through a kouign amann discovery phase at the time, and *needed* to try that famous version.  I enjoyed it, and the rest of the lineup looked great, but it never made it back to the top of my list during subsequent trips to NY.

Then, I spent 5 weeks in New York in the summer of 2023, and even with that longer stay, somehow visiting any of the locations (the bakery, the workshop) just never reached the top of my list.  So when I returned in October, I was determined to give it another shot.  This time, I visited the "Workshop".  It was so great I returned again in August 2024 when I spent another month in NY.

"Our newest shop is a celebration of croissants,  located right inside of our pastry production kitchens here in Flatiron, NYC, just a block up from Madison Square Park. Stop in for a taste of all different types of croissants and breakfast viennoiserie, stroll to the park, and enjoy!"

The Workshop really is that - it is their massive baking facility, with just a tiny little side area for those who want to stop by in person.  The menu is entirely different from the other locations (besides croissants and cookies), and they do NOT carry the cronut.  They offer a few savory items as well, but I focused on sweet.  

I really enjoyed my goodies, and several were particularly mind blowing.  Next time I'm in New York, I *will* return!

Pain au Chocolate. $7.70.

"Double chocolate croissant with three batons of chocolate."

I like chocolate.  I like croissants.  And yet chocolate croissants / pain au chocolate are rarely what I gravitate towards.  But I was drawn in by this as it wasn't a standard offering with chocolate only inside, but rather, chocolate in the dough as well (but it did have three big batons of chocolate within as well).

The pastry was exceptional, as expected.  Ridiculously flaky exterior that shattered in a beautifully messy way.  It did have a bit of chocolate flavor to it, but it wasn't dramatic.  The chocolate batons within were deep and dark, clearly high quality chocolate, definitely where the majority of the chocolate aspect came from.  The bakery likes to point out that they throw in an additional baton instead of the usual 2.

This still wouldn't be my top choice of croissant flavor, but, it was a high quality, textbook execution, of a pain au chocolate with a touch of extra chocolate.  ***+. 

Almond Croissant. $7.25.

"with extra homemade almond frangipane, crunchy toasted almonds, and confectioners sugar."

Oh, wow.  Um.  Wow.  This was truly fabulous.  I don't think I've had a better almond croissant, anywhere.  

Where to start ... it was stuffed full of very flavorful frangipane, that almost tasted like it had a boozy aspect to it, in a good way.  Plenty of it.  A+ filling.

And the pastry itself, top notch, well laminated, crispy, buttery, flaky, yadda yadda.  

And then, what pushed it far above and beyond other very good almond croissants: the topping.  It was absolutely coated in the slivered almonds, that had a deep toasty flavor, phenomenal crunch, and lots of caramelization.  Exceptional.

There is nothing that I'd change about this.  Flawless.  Perfect *****.

Croissants. $5.50 Classic / $6 Olive Oil.

"Classic Croissant made with Beurre d’Isigny French butter and Les Grands Moulins des Paris flour."

"Olive Oil Croissant made with cold-pressed extra virgin olive oil and a hint of rosemary, confit garlic, and coarse sea salt."

I think the larger ones here are the regular classic croissants, and the thinner the olive oil?

I tried a hunk of the olive oil croissant, mostly out of complete curiosity.  It really was interesting!  It was an excellent croissant, but, far more savory.  My brain somewhat tasted focaccia, with the oil/rosemary/salt (I didn't detect the garlic), but ... it was a croissant.  I think this would make a totally incredible breakfast sandwich (which, I realized after I wrote this, they do offer).  ***+.

Brown Sugar DKA. $6.50.

“Dominique’s Kouign Amann”: similar to a caramelized croissant, with tender flaky layers

inside and a caramelized crunchy crust outside. Our best-seller!!"

"Best described as a “caramelized croissant,” our classic DKA (short for “Dominique’s Kouign Amann”) is a Breton pastry that features a crispy, caramelized crust on the outside with a flaky and tender crumb within, and a bit of gooeyness in the center. It's no wonder these flaky golden pastries are our #1 best-seller here at the Bakery! "

And of course, I had to get a DKA.  I had this once before, my first ever visit to any Dominique Ansel location (Dominique Ansel Kitchen), and did find it to be one of the best kouign amann's I'd ever had.

It remains exceptionally well done.  Everything you want in a kouign amann: very crispy caramelized exterior, flaky layers, SOOO much butter and sugar flavor.  And their kinda signature touch of a slightly gooey caramel center.  

Sugar. Butter.  Crispness.  Decadence.  Yup.  ****+.

Chocolate Caramelia Triangle. $7.50.
(2023).

"Filled with silky Valrhona Caramelia (caramelized milk chocolate) pastry cream."

My first selection of more interesting items was inspired by the memory of a couple different cream filled flaky pastries I had during my stay in New York in August: the insanely delicious lobster tail from  Mia's Bakery in Brooklyn, and the chocolate cream version from Veniero's.  I was craving quality flaky pastry and delicious cream filling.

When I picked this up, I was shocked.  First, it was considerably bigger than I was expecting.  Much like most lobster tail pastries, it was a monster compared to the size of a standard danish or croissant.  But even though it was physically large, the weight still surprised me.  This thing was hefty.  Seriously, it weighed a ton.

The pastry was fairly standard laminated dough, like you'd get with any filled croissant.  Reasonably buttery, reasonably flaky, definitely not stale.  Not particularly great, but certainly better than an average bakery.  It had a few lines of a darker color through it, that might have been chocolate, but I didn't taste a difference in that area.  The pastry was a couple layers thick.  ***+.  (Don't mind the slight caramel glaze on top here, that actually came from my second item, that was packaged in the same bag as it).

Chocolate Caramelia Triangle: Inside.

Inside is where it got interesting.  It was absolutely loaded with the pastry cream.  This is where all the weight came from.  Light fluffy chocolate whipped cream this was not.  It was very thick custard style cream, with intense caramelia flavor.  If you are unfamiliar, caramelia is one of Valrhona's signature milk chocolates (36%), that has remarkably strong buttery caramel tones (it does have butter in it, after all).  This tasted like if you melted down a caramello bar (or any other sweet buttery caramel filled bar of your choice) and then made it into rich pastry cream.  Intense, intense, intense.  The pastry helped cut it a bit, but, wow, this was quite rich, and a little went a long way.  ***+.

If you are a caramel and chocolate lover, this is definitely worth a try.  I enjoyed it, but found it too heavy and rich to eat more than 1/3, maybe 1/2 of in one sitting, so I recommend sharing with someone.  I had the second half later with vanilla ice cream, which was a nice pairing, and helped cut the richness a bit.  

Sea Salt Hazelnut Praliné Flan. $7.75.
(2023).

"A French-style flan with hazelnut pastry cream baked in a laminated brioche nest, hazelnut praliné, and Maldon sea salt."

Next up, the incredibly fascinating flan pastry.  Yes, this was a laminated brioche "nest" (basically, a croissant shell), filled with thick rich flan, topped with hazelnut pastry cream, topped with hazelnut praliné (which, was basically like hazelnut butter), and some hazelnut pieces.  If I thought the previous item was rich, this was another notch.  It was also incredible.

The pastry itself was remarkable.  Much like the triangle pastry, it was well laminated, had beautiful layers, was reasonably crisp, but not particularly decadent, no noteworthy flavor.  Better than average, but not amazing.  ***+.

The pastry nest was very well formed, and thicker than the triangle pastry, as was needed to hold the marvelous contents.

Sea Salt Hazelnut Praliné Flan: Cross Section.

And here you can see those contents.

Filling the cup was the flan.  Well set, thick, rich, good flan.  Not too sweet,  This alone would be a good flan.  ****.  Together, the laminated nest and the flan filling sorta gave off the vibes of a Chinese egg custard tart or Portuguese pastel de nata, but, with a French spin.

But then ... the hazelnut praliné.  OMG.  It was one of the tastiest things I've had in a while, and, I say that eating lots of tasty things regularly.  It was sweet.  It was nutty.  It was gritty.  It was salty.  It was like the best cookie butter, but, amplified.  Truly, I think it is ground candied hazelnuts.  They should sell this by the jar.  I'd spread it on anything, including, my finger, direct in the jar.  This was bonkers good.  Perfectly ooey gooey too.  *****.  Flawless.

Add in some hazelnut halves for even more crunch, and more hazelnut flavor, and, well, this was just a truly wonderful treat to eat.  Every component could easily be enjoyed on its own - quality pastry, rich thick flan, insane-o hazelnut praliné.  But put it all together?  And it totally worked.

Glorious.  I'd get another with no hesitation.  ****.

Strawberries & Cream Pistachio Roll. $10.
(2024).

"Fresh strawberry compote, vanilla Chantilly, pistachio ganache, laminated brioche."

Oh, man.  Another one that may look the size of a normal filled croissant in this photo, but I assure you, it was not.  It was really quite large, easily splittable by 2-3 people.  The super-size of the pastries from the Workshop always surprises me, but it does make the now $10 price more reasonable.  

Anyway, what we had here was a laminated brioche, with bi-color layers of strawberry and regular pastry, with an attractive pattern on top, accented by strawberry white chocolate paint.  The ends were dunked in more of the white chocolate and covered in pistachio bits.

The pastry was good, clearly fresh, crispy.  It reminded me of croissant pastry, but a bit crispier, less big pockets of air, and a bit more rich.  You could really taste the butter, in a good way.  I guess, now I know what "laminated brioche" really is.  It was a good vehicle for what was to come.  **** pastry.

Strawberries & Cream Pistachio Roll: Chantilly.

I cut into it to reveal the fillings.  At first I was confused: why did I see only the white vanilla chantilly?  Where was the pistachio ganache? The fresh strawberry compote?  It turned out, the end with the pistachios decorating it was also filled about 1/4 of the way with pistachio ganache, and the strawberry compote was primarily concentrated in the top half as well.  So, don't just cut in half and hand one half off to a friend (unless you slice the other way or want one of you to not get all the great fillings).

The vanilla chantilly was pretty incredible.  I've never had such a light, fluffy cream in my life. It tasted so purely of cream, like, intense cream flavor, but, fluffy.  Remarkable.  ****+ cream.  Like something you'd get in Japan.

My slight complaint is that there really was not much of the strawberry compote, there was some in the folds of the pastry as you can see here, but that was about it.  It was sweet, fruity, light, and really went well with everything else, but I wanted more of it.  

Strawberry & Pistachio Roll: Pistachio Ganache.

And finally, the pistachio ganache, from the end with the pistachio bits on it.  It was thicker than the chantilly, a pretty light green color.  It was very rich, and mildly sweet, in a white chocolate sweet way.  I actually thought it didn't taste all that strongly of pistachio, but it was enjoyable anyway.  ***, because it didn't quite deliver in the pistachio department.  The pistachio bits on the end certainly did, and they also added nice crunch.

I did find the choice of concentrating the ganache on the end less than ideal.  It made those bites really almost too rich.  I liked the ganache, don't get me wrong, but I wanted more of the lighter cream to cut it, particularly given the richness of the laminated brioche.

If I sound critical, that is only because this is at the top echelon of baking perfection.  It was a very, very, very good pastry.  Most bakeries only dream of achieving this level of quality.  The pastry, the fillings, everything was truly textbook, which I mean in a perfection sense, not boring.  Overall, ****, and I'd certainly get it again, and can't wait to try more of their offerings.

Caramelia Feuilletine Clusters. $18.
(2023).

"These deliciously decadent clusters are made crunchy wafer crisps covered in rich Valrhona Caramelia (caramelized milk chocolate). Bet you can’t eat just one!"

And finally, since I was getting delivery one time, and couldn't resist just adding on one more item to take home with me, the caramelia feuilletine clusters, which feature one of my favorite things: feuilletine.  Take feuilletine and cover it in quality milk chocolate, and make it even more snackable by forming clusters?  Um, yes.

These were pretty much exactly the sum of their parts.  Feuilletine, super crispy, formed into clusters, smothered in very rich creamy Caramelia chocolate (the same used in the triangle pastry).  Crunchy, chocolatey, caramely, rich.  Very tasty, but I found that one cluster was enough at at ime.  I liked to pair with coffee, or top with whipped cream, to balance out a bit.

Very enjoyable, but I don't think I'd get another batch.  ***+.

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Balboa Cafe

Balboa Cafe is relatively well known in San Francisco, although I'll admit I was only vaguely aware of it until recently.  

"Since 1913, Balboa Cafe has served as one of San Francisco's oldest restaurant where it all started as a working-man’s saloon. Now it’s a cherished neighborhood establishment where people from all corners of the Bay Area and beyond come for community and our beloved classics, like the Balboa Burger on a baguette, the Wednesday Chicken Paillard special, and the famed Espressotini. Despite our city's evolution, Balboa Cafe remains a timeless destination for those seeking a taste of San Francisco's nostalgia."

It has a firm place in SF history, as its been around since 1913, and has been in operation the entire time, lasting through all sorts of interesting eras of history (Prohibition, the Great Depression, the '89 earthquake, Covid pandemic, etc).  Ownership has changed, interior modified, menu evolved, but, at its roots, the same establishment. 

"The evolution of the espresso martini is steeped in the genius of marrying two favorite pastimes - coffee and cocktails. The popularity of the iconic Balboa Espressotini gained traction early on, and our bartenders were challenged to keep up with the demand. In 2017, we partnered with Shane from Top Hat Provisions, who blended a proprietary, single-origin cold brew coffee that we could mix with our signature blend of spirits in a nitro tank to create an ice-cold espressotini tha’s shaken to frothy perfection."

The recent-ish rise to fame for Balboa Cafe is their Espressotini, which they introduced in 2017, and they now have on tap.  They definitely take credit for introducing SF to this phenomenon.  The current popularity seems to be as a boozy brunch scene on weekends, and nighttime watering hole, with some focus on the food, and the overall hospitality, but the primary focus is definitely the bar program.  As I don't frequent the Marina, nor do I generally go for boozy brunch, it hasn't really been on my radar.

I also assumed that it was rather hype-y, and commercialized ... after all, um, they have a lot of merch for sale, banded canned Espressotinis, and the like.  I was pleased to see that wasn't the case when I visited for weekend brunch one day.  There really was a fair amount of charm to the place, the host was remarkably hospitable, and the place just felt nicely worn in, comfortable, and authentic.  The food?  Well, eh.  But I did have my first espressotini, and that alone was a novel win.

Setting

Balboa Cafe is located right on Fillmore Street in a busy area of the Marina.

Entrance

The entrance is fairly charming, with a slightly shabby look of elegant time's past.

Bar.

The look extends inside to the long bar that is a central point of the restaurant.  So much old wood, mirrors, and just old school vibes.  It feels remarkably comfortable, as it is so clearly comfortable with itself.

Sidewalk Seating.

There are tables inside as well, but the coveted spots, at least for weekend brunch on a sunny day, are the outdoor tables.  They aren't a fancy setup, but by mid-afternoon, this is where the crowds definitely wanted to be, and the entire place was packed.

Drinks

Every patron at Balboa Cafe had an alcoholic drink in front of them, at 1:30pm on Saturday.  Again, clearly, people are here to drink, even during the day. Most everyone had the exact same drink: the espressotini, although there was a stray glass of rose at one end of the bar, and I saw a few beers get poured from the tap.  But mostly, that cocktail list, and certainly the wines (besides rose/sparkling), didn't seem to be something anyone took notice of.  

Drink Menu.

The reason people are at Balboa Cafe is the vibe, and the drinks.  The brunch menu called out a few cocktails in particular (obviously, their signature espressotini, along with the default brunch drinks of mimosa, bellini, or bloody mary, and the cadillac), but a full drink list, including beer, wine, ciders, and many more cocktails was provided.

Balboa Espressotini (decaf). $19.

"Stoli vanilla, kahlua, top hat cold brew espresso."

Clearly, I had to order the espressotini, right?  I mean, if everyone else is doing it, AND it is what they are known for ... 

I'll admit this was my first espressotini.  The reason is pretty simple: I don't drink caffeine after about 10am, I limit even decaf coffee and chocolate until about 2pm, and never have anything with any caffeine later than that.  Although I drink a glass of wine with dinner nearly every night, and enjoy a cocktail when I go out, I rarely day drink.  So ... the espressotini really just doesn't have much place in my lifestyle.  But I see why they are so popular: they jazz you up, AND make you tipsy, AND taste like dessert?  Winner, winner, and danger, danger.

But anyway, yes, espressotinis are fairly popular these days, but why such a BIG THING at Balboa Cafe in particular?  I think because they were a bit ahead of the trend, and introduced them in 2017, and, well, for the younger Marina crowd, this was a very fitting drink for their lifestyles.  And so it took off, making Balboa a destination for folks.  They couldn't keep up with the demand of making so many of them (pulling shots, shaking, etc), so they worked with a coffee producer to make a super concentrated cold brew that they could put on tap to use for the base of the drink, eliminating much of the manual work.  The bartenders churn out a lot of these daily, and do so with incredible throughput. 

I however wanted decaf, knowing that super concentrated coffee at 2pm was not an ok idea for me.  Luckily, Balboa Cafe *does* offer a decaf version, but it definitely isn't the same recipe as the regular.  My bartender needed to actually brew a decaf shot and mix the old fashioned way in a shaker to produce the decaf version.  When it was sat down in front of me, it didn't look nearly as good as the ones everyone else had (I didn't see anyone else get decaf, just me, the lame old person ...). It was all mixed up and foggy, as you can see here.

Balboa Espressotino: once settled.

But then it settled, and looked much like everyone else's.  It really is an attractive drink once it settles, frothy on top, deep and rich below.  

And, sigh, it really is remarkably delicious.  Sweet from the vanilla Stoli and Kahlua.  Super frothy.  Nice bitterness from espresso.  Amps you up, gets you drunk, AND is like a dessert all in one.  I instantly understood why everyone loves these.  Yes, yes, this was totally delicious (but such a bad idea! Did I get old somewhere along the way?).

****.

Side note: You can now even buy a nitro canned version of the espressotini from Balboa Cafe directly to take home, if you must.

House Sparkling Water (complimentary).

I asked for sparkling water, and was originally given tap ice water.  I asked again, and this time was given sparkling water from the soda dispenser in the bar.  It came attractively served, with a lime wedge, but, I hated the taste.  Not filtered, and just not good.  In the future I'd remember to ask for bottled sparkling.

Food

As I mentioned, Balboa Cafe is very popular.  It is very well known.  But it is not because of the food.  That was clear to me from my research before visiting, but extremely clear once I actually had my first bite.  The food was highly mediocre, mostly below average for even a generic boring restaurant.  You do not go there for the food.

Brunch Menu.

The brunch menu has a combination of items from their weekday lunch menu, their dinner menu classics, and some more breakfast appropriate dishes.

I was interested in most of the seafood options (ahi tuna cones, fried calamari, mussels mariniere), but also was a bit skeptical that a place known for the espressotini and not really for the food would do a decent job with seafood.  Most people around me seemed to be getting burgers and fries (if anything, plenty were there just for drinks).  I opted for one starter, one salad, one entree, and of course desserts, intending to take whatever was leftover home.

Buttermilk Fried Calamari. $19.

"Spicy marinara, house tartar sauce."

Well, my meal didn't start off very well.  The calamari was highly, highly mediocre.

On the plus side, it had a good distribution of rings and tentacles, and was served warm.  I appreciated the lemon wedges.  

But, the rings in particular were quite chewy, some pieces tasted fishy, and the coating wasn't particularly flavorful nor crisp.  The "spicy" marinara was not spicy at all and tasted like a jar tomato sauce, the tartar was average, mostly mayo.  It is nice that they offered both sauces, I'm definitely one for the tartar (or really, cocktail), but I know many people like the Italian style marinara sauce with theirs.

**.  I would not get this again, and did not even come close to finishing it (even the leftovers air fried at home to make crispy just weren't tasty as they were far too chewy and just ... not good tasting).

Grilled Veggie Salad. $22.
No goat cheese, "dressing on the side", add shrimp (+$8)

"Grilled asparagus, summer squash & red onion, romaine, raddicchio, carrots, radish, basil, sunflower seeds, cherry tomatoes, goat cheese, herbed champagne vinaigrette."

I moved on to a salad. I asked for no goat cheese, dressing on the side, and added shrimp.  My order was initially taken by a server who was just memorizing it all, but as soon as I made modifications, he pulled out a napkin and wrote it down.  Unfortunately, that napkin didn't seem to serve him, or me, well.

When my salad was placed in front of me, I thought I had gotten someone else's order.  Clearly this wasn't mine, right?  Because ...  I asked for dressing on the side, to start. But also, when this was brought out, I really thought it was another salad, not the grilled veggie salad.  The server assured me it was the grilled veggie salad.  And I guess it was, but, it WAS dressed when I asked for it not to be, and, well, I certainly expected it to have more grilled vegetables.

The base was fine - torn romaine and radicchio, very fresh and crisp.  Matchstick carrots were fine too, and I liked the big slices of radish.  Cherry tomatoes were flavorful and not mealy.  So actually, a pretty decent base.  ***+.

But where were those grilled vegetables?  I had exactly four very small pieces of zucchini that seemed raw, zero red onion that was listed in the description, and a few small shaved pieces of asparagus.  I was looking forward to big juicy asparagus spears, chunks of summer squash, and some lovely grilled onions.  The components that were there were good, but, just not what I was expecting, and really quite minimal for a "grilled veggie" named salad.  ***+.

The real issue was the dressing.  I wanted it on the side as I don't like vinaigrettes, and this was really, really, really dressed in it.  Very tangy, and just not what I like at all.  Booo.  I didn't bother correcting the situation though.  I truly disliked the dressing.

The salad lacked any seasoning, but luckily pepper and salt were on the table, and the pepper in particular really helped.

For $8 I added shrimp, which was a portion of 6.  The shrimp were large, juicy, properly deveined and cleaned.  Great bounce to them, not rubbery.  Better than average / expected.  Definitely worth the $8. ***+.

Overall, if the dressing had been left off as I wanted, I would have liked it, and just been sad it wasn't more grilled veggie forward, but as served, it was a miss for me entirely.  *** besides the dressing, but ** with.  Also, really, a $30 salad?  (add also 4% SF tax, 8.625% state tax, and at least 20% tip, and this becomes a $40.50 salad.  Um, craziness).

Pulled Pork Sandwich.  $22.

"Remoulade, onion ring, fresno chilies, pickled onion slaw, brioche bun."

I tried to order the mussels as my main dish, but I was told I couldn't take home any leftovers because it was shellfish.  I've never been told you can't take shellfish home before, but, that was their policy.  They said the mussels were the only dish that couldn't be taken as leftovers.  Um, ok.

So I went with my third choice, the pulled pork.  The menu did not say that it came with fries, but it did.  The fries were very mediocre, thin, crispy, but not very well seasoned, and not very actually flavorful.  I would have preferred another side choice, and I saw others asked if they wanted fries or salad with their sandwiches, so not sure why I wasn't asked, nor why the menu didn't specify the side (it only lists the fries as coming with the burger). ** fries.  The ketchup tasted odd.

The pulled pork sandwich was decent though.  Glossy brioche bun that was lightly toasted inside.  The top bun was smothered with remoulade which seemed unnecessary with the already sauced pork.  I'm all for mayo sauces, but this seemed a bit overkill.  Under that was a big juicy onion ring.  I liked how hefty it was.  It made me wish onion rings were actually on the menu - if they can make one here, couldn't they make a basket of rings as an appetizer or side?  They have a nice lineup other sides, including fried items, so it doesn't seem like a fryer space problem ... I'd love to order onion rings with remoulade to dip them in! 

The pulled pork was a good portion, and all well shredded.  Well sauced in a fairly sweet sauce, slight bbq notes.  Moist.  Under that was the slaw, a vinegar style, very tart.  Nice for a bit of freshness, but a touch too high on the acid for me.  I never found any fresno chiles.

So overall, a decent enough pulled pork sandwich, ***.  Not something I'd go back for, but, it was decent enough.

Dessert Menu.

After a fairly lackluster meal, I still asked to see the dessert menu, as my sweet tooth always needs satisfying (although, to be honest, the espressotini really did serve as a pretty decent dessert item!).

The options all sounded decent - none that were totally amazing, but all ones I'd be happy to try: an ice cream sundae, chocolate lava cake, sticky toffee pudding, creme brûlée.  Nothing earth shattering, but standard crowd pleasing desserts, and ones I have dedicated labels for on my blog.

I asked my server how the desserts were, and he said they were good.  I asked his favorite, and he told me he doesn't actually like sweets.  Well, ok ... I tried to ask what other people seem to like, and he simply told me that the ice cream sundae was really large and would be too much for me.  He quasi suggested the sticky toffee pudding, but not in a convincing way at all.

Sticky Toffee Pudding.  $15.

"Medjool dates, toffee sauce, vanilla gelato." 

So, I went for the semi-recommended sticky toffee pudding.  I do love a good sticky toffee pudding, and went on an epic quest last time I was in London to try it essentially everywhere (including an average version at Heddon Street Kitchen, an awful version at Hawksmoor Seven Dials, and my favorite, amusingly from the buffet restaurant, Tibits).

This though .... wow, what a letdown.  Where to start.

It was:

1. Cold, not warm. Who serves sticky toffee pudding not warmed up?
2. Hard.  What is sticky toffee pudding without gooey, moist, softness?
3. Dry.  Entirely, um, not sticky?  There was literally no signature sticky toffee sauce at all, only a little drizzle of caramel on top of the gelato.  None on the cake.  Um, what?

The cake was basically just dry, hard, and tasted like dates.  Not sticky toffee pudding, and not enjoyable. *.

The gelato was fine.  The caramel drizzle was fine, but seemed likely not house made, just the kind from a squirt bottle.  *** gelato and sauce.

* star overall, sorry, this was just not sticky toffee pudding.

Vanilla Creme Brûlée. $12.

"Anis biscotti."

I hedged my bets though and also got another favorite of mine: creme brûlée.  As you know, I love all puddings, and have a label on my blog just for creme brûlée, so I was excited for this.

Sigh.  Another letdown.

It *did* pass the tap test.  Lovely caramelization on top.  But the body of the creme brûlée was not well set; it was remarkably runny.  Flavor trended too high in the egginess too.  It basically was like a creme anglaise sauce, just with a caramelized top.

Overall, good top, but meh overall.  I also wanted a few fresh berries or something.  **.

Biscotti: this was fine, crispy, good anise flavor.  ***.

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Costco Bakery

Update Review, January 2025

As you may recall from past reviews, I've had little exposure to Costco in my life (didn't live near one until I moved to SF, no car nor membership here), but I've recently discovered their bakery really does have some winning products, and as a lover of baked goods, this is a great discovery.  So when a co-worker brought in one of their latest items that is getting tons of hype, of course I was excited when I got to try it - although I didn't know, at the time, what I was trying.

Almond Croissant Pastry. $11.99/6.

I found this box of pastries sitting on the counter in our kitchen area at work.  "Kouign amann!!!", I thought, and eagerly snatched one (taking a moment to think, "hey, these are huge, you should get a knife and cut one in half", but then feeling lazy/greedy, and stuck with grabbing a full one).  I had a post-lunch cup of coffee in hand already, and this seemed like the perfect pairing.

Before I dug into the pastry, I snatched up bits of the roasted slivered almonds (great!) and some of the almond paste spilling out of the generously stuffed pastry (also very good).  And then I went to rip off / cut a chunk of the pastry.  My joy was immediately squashed.  It ... was not crispy and caramelized as a kouign amann should be.  It was much softer.  Like, well, a croissant or danish.  It had decent lamination, and extremely strong buttery flavor, but it was not at all what I was expecting from a kouign amann.  But it looked like a kouign amann ... right?

It was only later that I learned these were not actually supposed to be kouign amann.  They are dubbed a almond "croissant pastry" in the US (or a "blossom" in Canada).  Think of it like a cross between a croissant or a filled danish in the shape of a very large muffin, folded in a similar style to a kouign amann, but lacking the caramelization.  Aha.  So it wasn't supposed to be the breton pastry I thought it was.

In that context, yes, it was an acceptable, but not super compelling, pastry.  As I said, good butter flavor, and really, really generous amount of sweet almond paste within (boarding on too much?).  There was something about the flakes of almonds on top that was above average too.  But still not something I was that excited for ... yet I had a very large item to finish (they are really quite large, and really quite heavy with all the filling). **+ pastry, *** filling/topping, at room temperature.

So of course I brought it home (waste not!), and warmed it up in the toaster oven later.  Like other Costco danishes, it was transformed.  The pastry got flaky, and the buttery flavor intensified, but didn't leak out.  I topped it with vanilla ice cream, which went so well to balance the sweet almond filling.  I added fresh berries.  Served this way, it was really, really, really good.  **** even.

I see why people are excited about these, and as long as you don't go in expecting a kouign amann, and ideally warm it up, they really are a good product.

Update Reviews, 2024

Pastries

It has been a long time since I've had Costco pastries.  I do still have fond memories of their almond poppyseed muffins (which you can read about below), but I hadn't ever sought out more in recent years (and I'm not a Costco member).  But I recently attended an event with Costco pastries (I didn't know the source at the time), and thus, unbeknownst to me, got the chance to indulge again in Costco goodies.

Pastries.

The event had a selection of danishes - cheese, cherry, almond, and a bunch of cinnamon rolls, at least some of which were filled.  I picked two items to try, wishing they were cut in half so I could try more!

For a danish, I was torn between all three options, somewhat wanting the cheese one because that is one where even if the pastry is meh, you can scoop out all the filling and have a mini cheesecake, somewhat wanting the twice-baked almond one because I was drawn in by the slivered almonds and powdered sugar, but finally settled on the cherry one because it was the most limited.  Yes really, there was only one box of those, so they were somehow more special and exclusive.

The others I thought were all the same morning buns, but I realized later when looking at the photos that some were a lot thinner than others (e.g. the front middle ones), and mine definitely had unexpected filling in it, so I suspect there were actually several kinds here.

Cherry Danish.

The pastry was fairly lackluster.  Not particularly flaky, not particularly buttery.  It was unnaturally yellow.  But it wasn't stale.  Average generic pastry.  

The cherry filling was very flavorful, had plenty of goo, and the cherries were quite soft.  It was "cherry pie from a can" style, which isn't unpleasant if you are in the mood for it.  I later scooped it out and served it warm over ice cream.

The cherry and cheese danishes were drizzled with very sweet generic white icing.

So overall, nothing exactly wrong with it, but nothing great either.  The cherry filling was the best part.  The pastry was a bit better warmed up, but not much.  Very low  ***.

Update: I later found out that these are actually from Costco!  And apparently they stopped having them for a while and fans were outraged, and so they came back (just the cherry ones, they almond and cheese never left).  I guess I am alone in thinking they are mediocre? 

Raspberry Morning Bun.

After the lackluster danish, I didn't have high hopes for the bun, but it was much, much better.

When I grabbed this, I thought it was a regular cinnamon roll.  I was surprised when I looked more closely to see colored goo between the folds, rather than cinnamon filling.  The dusting on the outside that I had assumed was cinnamon and sugar turned out to be just sugar, and yes, that was raspberry filling inside.

The pastry itself was again fairly average, not particularly flaky, not particularly amazing flavor, but it wasn't strangely yellow, and was much better than the danish pastry.  It was actually quite good warmed up, as that made it more flaky, and brought out the buttery notes.  The raspberry filling was really fruity and flavorful, but there wasn't much of it.  Overall the sweetness was pleasant but not too sweet, even with the sugar on the outside.  

So warm, with some ice cream, I did quite enjoy this, once I wrapped my head around the fact that I wasn't having a cinnamon treat.  I am not sure if I've ever had a raspberry morning bun before, and it definitely worked.  Higher ***+.  I'd get this again.

Desserts

Another few events catered by Costco, and I had my eyes on the dessert.  I knew Costco makes great muffins, so I hoped the same would be true for other items.

Original Review, November 2021

Dessert Table: All Costco.

The dessert lineup was all from Costco.  I ... tried everything.

Caramel Tres Leches: Top. $12.99.

The Caramel Tres Leches is is an impressive looking dessert.

Layers visible from the sides, glaze on top, flakes of chocolate (which, to be honest, were a bit random.  Chocolate and tres leches and caramel?  Why the chocolate?)

Caramel Tres Leches: Side Profile. 

With a slice removed, you can see the layers better: two layers of the cream, two layers of the cake, all about equal in size.

The cake was quite moist, as you'd expect, and did seem to be soaked in some milks.  It was fine, but sweet, which I sorta expected.

The cream layers however did not provide any balance to the sweet cake.  The cream was crazy sweet, caramel cream, rather than traditional whipped cream found on tres leches cake.  It tasted like caramel, but had a strange aftertaste.  The texture was nice though, creamy and smooth.

Overall, this was just highly mediocre.  Not balanced, too sweet, and strange aftertaste.  But it looked good.

**+.

Caramel Flan. $12.99.

The flan looked almost homemade, swimming in a pool of caramel syrup.

It was fine.

Not too eggy, good texture, well set.  The syrup was sweet, but not particularly complex.

Basically, fine, but not notable in any way.

***.

Oatmeal Raisin Cookies.

Well, I don't really like cookies, and oatmeal raisin is fairly universally known as the worst of all the cookies, but ... these really were good for what they were.

Large size cookies, really soft, the way I do like my cookies.  Sweet in a decadent way.  Aggressively spiced but in a way that made them actually interesting.  Plentiful raisins, that were actually soft, not hard pellets. 

For a cookie, an oatmeal raisin one at that, there were actually good.  And for $0.30 each ... definitely a value.

***+.

Update Review, March 2024

Pi Day.  The sweet version.

Chocolate Peanut Butter.  $19.99.

"Butter & graham crust / peanut butter cream / chocolate cream."

I had heard about this thing when it came out right before Pi Day last year, and the internet went kinda crazy over it.  I was fairly thrilled to get to try it.  The hype was over the top, but I have access to fresh pies and good bakery items regularly, so I didn't really think a Costco item would be rate particularly highly for me.  I was ready to say, "meh".

It turns out, the hype was valid.  This thing, in full size, weighs 5 pounds.  They consider it 16 servings, but if you were to somehow go for the whole thing, it is 8,640 calories, 656 g fat ... and pure glory.

The crust is super crispy, graham and butter crust per their description, but super compressed (not sawdust like) and definitely heavy in the butter and sugar.  Basically like a Biscoff crust but with gritty texture.  It was great, and complimented the rest of the pie really well.

Above that is the peanut butter cream layer, which you can't see here, but there is a full peanut butter cream layer above the crust.  It has a strong peanut butter flavor, and is fluffy and rich.  A little goes a long way.

And then, chocolate cream, lighter, more mousse like, but also pretty rich.  Mild milk chocolate flavor.  Of course it went well with the peanut butter, classic pairing.

Each component was tasty, each component worked well with the others, and although it was very very rich overall, it was pretty delicious, and did leave me wanting just one more bite ... after a short break.  It isn't, at least for me, the type of dessert you immediately go back for seconds of, but you do plan them for the future.

****.  I'd score it more highly if it had a dark chocolate element, even just some dark chocolate shavings, to balance it out a bit more.

Apple Pie.  $12.99.

The apple pie is equally massive.  The pie weighs between 4.5-5lbs, and costs $12.99.  They consider it 16 servings.  And those would be pretty generous servings.

This is actually a pretty nice looking pie.  Full double crust (not lattice) with leaf shaped cutouts, studded with pearl sugar.  The crust looked, and tasted, homemade.  If anyone I knew had made a crust like that, I'd sing their praises.  It far surpassed any grocery store crust I've had before, and was on par with a good bakery crust.

The filling was good too - big bite size hunks of apple, nicely al dente, not soft or mushy.  Good spicing, and actually a fairly thick goo, not the pie-from-a-can style.

Overall, just, a really good apple pie, that, besides the giant size, could totally pass as bakery or homemade.  Even better warm with ice cream.  ****.

Original Review, Muffins, 2021

Feel free to judge away as you read this, I would.

You know Costco muffins.  Maybe you haven't bought them at Costco itself, but if you have ever had a muffin at a coffee shop or from a corner store where they aren't baked in-house, there is a very, very good chance they are Costco muffins.

They are easily recognizable.  First, they are huge.  Seriously, 2x the size of something that would already be considered a large muffin.  The diameter is impressive.  And they weight a ton.

They come in a few flavors: standard blueberry, almond poppy, or apple crumb, and then for the chocolate lovers, there are chocolate vanilla, chocolate banana, or double chocolate chip for those who don't even want to pretend this is "breakfast" food.  And honestly, these aren't really breakfast food.  Sugar is the second ingredient in all of them, after flour.  They have about 50g of sugar each, helping make up their 700 calories.  I told you they were hefty!

I got a bit fascinated by Costco muffins after having one and uh, liking it.  I found out some terrifying details, like that they have a 45 day shelf life, once they are brought to room temp (which is after they've been frozen at Costco, and frozen in the warehouses before that).  They have many ingredients that are probably not meant for human consumption.  They are miracles of food science.  They last forever, even when barely wrapped up in flimsy plastic wrap.  They don't get crumbly.  They remind me of the mutant ice cream my dad discovered once that never melted.

Almond Poppyseed.

This was the first Costsco muffin I had.  And I liked it.  It was huge and dense.  Very moist, particularly on top, where it was kinda a bit gummy.  So generic, but totally endearing.  It really was exactly what I remembered muffins being.  I can't recall the last time I had this style of muffin in the past ... 10 years?  15?  They are nothing like homemade, nothing like what I get fresh baked at bakeries around town.

The completely amusing thing to me is that we have fresh muffins every morning at work.  They are house made.  They use real ingredients.  And ... I got sick of them long ago.  I passed up my office's fresh corn blueberry muffin in order to eat this Costco one.  I can honestly say I preferred the Costco one, although I'm hoping it was just due to the novelty and change.  I couldn't possibly like this thing based on its merits, right?

Anyway, back to the muffin.  The top was my favorite part.  Again, amusing, as it wasn't crisp, but rather gummy.  Kinda gross when I think about it.  But I liked it.  The sides and bottom were disappointing, a bit dry and over-brown.  This didn't matter though, since the thing was so ridiculously big that I still have plenty of muffin to eat by just consuming the top and the insides.  Just consider the edges and bottom as part of the wrapper :)

It was loaded with poppy seeds.  Seriously, so many seeds.  They added a delightful crunch to every bite.  The almond flavor is what really made it special.  Most poppy seed muffins are lemon, which I don't like nearly as much.  The almond flavor was just so nice.

It was also insanely buttery.  Well, I guess not buttery, uh, shortening-y.  Part of the magic to keep it moist, and part of why its fat content is through the roof.  These aren't really suitable for human consumption on a regular basis.

I don't care how much you judge me, I liked this thing.  If I was somewhere that had them, and I was hungry, I'd totally get another.  I sorta wish I'd gotten two when I got this one, particularly now that I know I can keep it for 45 days.  Shutter.

Update Review, May 2021

It has been years since I had a Costco muffin, but I remembered the poppyseed always being my favorite.  Unlike nearly every poppyseed muffin on the market, this one is *not* lemon poppyseed.  No, it is *almond* poppyseed.

It lived up to my memories.  Mind you, this is not a homemade tasting muffin, you can tell it is a mass produced generic muffin.  So bad for you, really, yet so good.

I loved the crunch of poppy seeds, the strong almond marzipan-like flavor.  

****.

Blueberry.

Ok, so maybe I went back to the corner store where I found the poppyseed muffin to get another.  The blueberry didn't look good, but they had only blueberry and chocolate banana when I went back.  Whoops.  Did I just admit that I went back for one?

The muffin seemed very basic, just a plain muffin with some blueberries in it.  It didn't have the lovely almond flavor that made the poppy seed muffin so special.  The muffin was again very moist and dense.  If you blindfolded me and fed me a piece of it, I would have thought it was poundcake, not a muffin.  And, that is where this falls down for me.  I haven't met a poundcake I liked.  And seriously, this was a poundcake.  The base way too sweet to really be a muffin.  If you like poundcake, you would like this.

The berries were impressive though, which I know sounds ridiculous, as I'm sure they were just frozen crap, but they were really moist and popped with fruitiness when you bit into them.

I was slightly fascinated by this muffin, mostly in how cakey it was, so I kept trying it, but pretty much hated every bite, and I certainly wouldn't get another.  Ojan, who loves blueberry muffins, also refused to have even more than a bite of this.  He independently deemed it a poundcake.

*+.

Chocolate Banana.

I got this at the same time as the blueberry, again, it didn't look good, and I don't really like banana muffins, but they didn't have my precious poppy seed, and if that muffin taught me anything, it was not to judge.  So I tried the chocolate banana.

It was as bad as it looked.  Dried out yet gummy moist on top.  The chocolate chips were all on top, the rest was just a plain sweet "muffin" base, totally uninteresting.  Again, it seemed like a sweet pound cake.  Likely the same base as the blueberry muffin.  It was banana flavored, but there was no evidence of actual banana - no chunks, no coloring, etc.  On top was also some lighter colored bits, I guess trying to be a streusel, but they were dried out and flavorless.

I tried to give this to Ojan,  but he wouldn't even try it.  Even though I hated it, I couldn't let a giant muffin go to waste.  With my expectations reset, I warmed up a chunk in the toaster oven.  Now it was a bit moister.  And since I was expecting cake and not a muffin, I served it with ice cream as dessert.  Far more appropriate.  Was it amazing?  No way.  Would I get another?  Definitely not.  But, it was salvaged.  Toaster ovens and ice cream can save just about anything in my world :)

**.

Double Chocolate (May 2021).

MEH.  While I adore the almond poppyseed muffin, the same cannot be said about the double chocolate.

This was such a boring muffin.  Light chocolate flavor, not deep and rich, and certainly nothing like a chocolate cake.  It wasn't stale, but was fairly dry.  Not moist.

The "double" chocolate came in the form of 2-3 chocolate chunks in my muffin.  Bo-ring.

Highly underwhelming, and I'd like to know what they put in it to make it 680 calories and yet ... not even tasty!

I salvaged it by soaking it in milk, warming it up, and serving a la mode, more like a cake, and that was ok, but I clearly wouldn't get another.

**.

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