United Airlines UA 870, SYD-SFO

Update Review, February 2024

Flight 870 SYD-SFO

Seat 11A

Aircraft 777-200

Departure: Sydney 2:00pm (scheduled) 3:51pm (actual) 

Arrival: San Francisco 8:45am (scheduled) 10:22am (actual)

Well, since I've reviewed this route many times before, I was going to skip my pre-amble and let you read the original reviews if you want it, but, there were a few elements to this journey that deserve a call out.

My flight started with a bit amount of misfortune.  A fairly epic storm in Sydney.  Impressive really, to watch, but from inside the terminal, we all knew we were doomed.  The thunder was so intense it was shaking the terminal.  The sound of the wind, and the downpour, nearly as thunderous.  And the constant lightening strikes?  Wowzer.  I saw later in the news that there were 75,000 lightening strikes that afternoon.  Multiple people struck by lightening.  Homes set on fire.  Um, yeah.  I believe it.  Let's just say, there were no aircraft going anywhere, nor arriving.

United did not do a very good job of dealing with this ground experience and communicating it.  From inside the Air New Zealand lounge, they let folks know there were delays.  Same with the Singapore lounge.  Same with announcement made at other airline gates.  But United?  The app still told me "go to gate" and "boarding soon", as lightening struck all around AND we didn't even have an aircraft at the gate.  I hung around the gate waiting to hear ... something.  Anything.  But our flight still showed on time (even though we were well past boarding time at this point), no delays issued, no announcements made, and an app that kept sending notifications about boarding soon.  I finally asked the gate agent, who explained that our aircraft was in Sydney (which I knew, it had landed at 6am), but it was parked out of the way, and the ground crews weren't allowed out to move it to us until the lightening stopped.  No idea when *that* would be.  

Eventually there was a break in the lightening, our plane got to us, and we started boarding.  Moments later, the downpour intensified, and the lightening was back, and ground stop went back into effect.  We still finished boarding, although passengers were getting soaked just in the jetway connector to the plane, as the rain was so intense.  And we sat.  The captain did keep us informed at that point, about how the ramp was closed, and we hadn't been able to finish fueling up yet, so, we needed it to become safe for the ground crews to get back out and do that.  And there was no way of knowing when that would be of course.  And so we sat.  He did notify us once again when they were able to begin fueling, and once they completed.  And he told us what was going on once we pushed back and sat - he explained that they needed to let a bunch of aircraft land that were stuck circling for the past two hours.  He did a great job, the United app, the United flight status, most definitely did not - it was only once our initial departure time had passed that a delay was finally issued, which then proceeded to just get 15 minutes added to it over and over again.

While we sat there, a pre-departure beverage of sparkling wine was offered.  I declined, and didn't try to ask for anything else.  Knowing we might be sitting there a while, and that the seatbelt sign was likely to stay on for quite a while once airborne (which ending up being true, for the FAs too), I didn't want to consume more liquid!  No mattress pads or pjs's proactively offered, although pajamas were available on demand if you asked (and knew to ask).  Only a few mattress pads were available, and I quickly heard others being told they had run out.  Our flight was far from full, and it frustrates me that United skimps on these.

Back to the positive though.  The great in-flight team continued with my flight attendant Mary who was proactive and friendly throughout the flight.  She genuinely seemed interested in us as human beings and was pleasant to be around.  Special kudos for always giving a full can of Aha, and honoring my request for both desserts (granted, there were only 33 passengers in the 50 person cabin, so, clearly enough to go around).

This was my first time on the smaller 777-200 on this route - normally they use the same -300ER that I flew to Sydney on, but they just swapped it a few days prior to accommodate their seasonal schedule.  I had swapped my flight just the day before, so I wasn't able to select a window seat in the front cabin, and took my gamble in the back cabin.  I knew on the smaller aircraft this had some real downsides, as they have one fewer cabin crew working that cabin, and the bathroom ratio is worse, but luckily, our flight was not full, so those were never issues.  I was also a bit concerned about engine noise due to sitting right near the engine and wing, but it wasn't as bad as I feared.  Mostly, the difference between the -200 and the -300ER was less a big deal than I thought it would be, although I did miss having my own air vents (not offered on the smaller, older plane).

Linner Menu.

The menu started with a choice of two different cheese appetizers (mozzarella or halloumi, both vegetarian), followed by fairly classic beef (brisket though, so slightly different), chicken, fish (salmon), or pasta (ravioli).  Nothing called out to me.  I've never really cared for the ravioli on United flights before, but I wasn't really into any of the other options, and none even had sides I was interested in (not even some mashed potatoes were on offer!).  And thus, I went for the ravioli, entirely for the cream sauce and roast pumpkin, and brought my own other food to supplement.

Wines.

The wine list was unchanged from my past few flights.

Warm Nuts.

Once underway, we were given placemats and ramekins of nuts, as is standard.

The nuts were a pleasant surprise, as they were actually a full mix of nuts: almonds, cashews, walnuts, and even ... I had one macadamia nut!  They were served nicely warm.

Argyle Pinot Noir, 2022.

My red wine options were the LVE Signature Cabernet that I didn't really care for on my flight three weeks prior, the Penfolds shiraz that I've always found pretty blah, and an Oregon pinot noir, so I went for that.

It was remarkably boring.  No complexity.  Not offensive I guess, but, wow, tasted like ... nothing? Low ***.

Meal Tray.

Per United service standards the meal is served all at once, hand delivered row by row.

Warm Breads.

No bread basket, but two rolls came on my tray, both ones I quasi like, and warm.  Slight preference for the seed topped one. ***.

Salad: Mesclun Salad.

"with cherry tomatoes and pumpkin seeds."

Meager salad: limp-tastic with gross tomatoes. Pumpkin seeds were nice for crunch.  **+.

Appetizer: Marinated halloumi cheese.

" with olives, oranges, marinated cucumbers, spiced honey, and crackers."

For the appetizer, we were actually given (verbally, just before our meal was brought to us) the choice of cheese (tomato/mozzarella) or other cheese (halloumi with olives/citrus).  I went for the halloumi.

The halloumi was actually fine.  The menu said it was marinated which it didn't seem to be, but everything else was.  It came with well seasoned stuffs with it, that were swimming in marinade that was flavorful enough, but I don't like olives/citrus that much.  I did like the marinated cucumber, even though it was fairly mushy.  The menu claimed there would be crackers, but there were not.

*** halloumi, *** cucumbers, meh to the rest.

Entree: Cheese and spinach ravioli.

"with pesto cream sauce, bell pepper, broccolini, and roasted pumpkin."

I got the pasta, which had strangely VERY good broccolini - which I say as someone who usually hates it and loathes how much the cafes at my office serve it, but it was al dente and not soggy at all, and almost roasted?  It was strangely good.  ***+.  There were pretty decent cubes of pumpkin (squash) too. ***+.  I didn't try the bell pepper cubes as I don't care for it.

The pesto cream sauce that I was looking forward to was fairly average, and the ravioli not really anything better than microwave meal ravioli, and I didn't care for the flavor, but it was not mushy or dried out, and was a large portion of 8 patties.  **+ to those parts.

Port.

I was glad port was available, and enjoyed it as always.  Such a nice sweet treat, and something I always look forward to on flights (and really need to add to my "real" life too!) ***+.

Mango cheesecake.

A new dessert on the rotation, mango cheesecake.  Since many of the United desserts actually come from Eli's Cheesecake (e.g. the pie in the sky, the yummy apple custard cake that was on rotation earlier this year), I had high hopes for the cheesecake, particularly as cheesecake is Eli's specialty after all, and I've enjoyed some in the past.  

I don't think this was an Eli's product though.  It wasn't a classic cheesecake wedge, rather, a bar.  The cheesecake flavor, as in cream cheese, was minimal at best.  It was more like just a thick set mousse.  It was creamy, texture was good, and it was sweet and maybe a bit mango flavored, but, it certainly didn't remind me of a cheesecake.  Great consistency, but tasted sorta like ... nothing.  The base was a soft cake, which was an odd pairing.

There was nothing offensive or bad about this item per se, but, it wasn't really a cheesecake, and mostly left me wondering, "um, where's the taste?".  If you go for this, I recommend asking for sundae toppings on top.  **+.

Ice Cream Sundae: Caramel, Almonds, Whipped Cream.

But of course I also got the sundae.  Because, how can you not?

I opted for the same toppings as always on my ice cream sundae: caramel (although I do really want to try the fudge sometime, I am always flying at night and avoiding caffeine), nuts for crunch, and whipped cream.  I skip the strawberry goo and cherry, because I never like either, and bring my own fresh berries to add instead (and sprinkles of course).

The ice cream was served at a very appropriate temperature, not rock solid, not melty, just soft enough to easily eat, and not melting too fast so you had to rush.  No ice crystals, and much better overall than it has been on any United flights I remember in the past few years.  I adored the sweet caramel (although I'd prefer just a bit less!), and the crunch from the sliced almonds.  Whipped cream was fine.  Overall, one of the best sundaes I've had on a United flight (particularly with my additions after).  Perfect with my port.  ****.

Breakfast.

Breakfast is served on a tray all at once, about 1.5 hours before landing.  Out of Sydney there is never yogurt nor cereal, just the bread of the day (often a roll out of Sydney, but the more appropriate croissant this time), fruit bowl (which I had to skip because it had watermelon), and choice of two entrees: eggs or carbs.  Jam and butter provided as well.  Orders are taken at your seat as you wake up, and brought to you within just a few minutes.  They clearly just heat them all up and serve whatever people take, and ditch the rest.

Coffee Regular.

The coffee was better than usual on United flights, warm, no funk.  Not bad at all.  ***+.

I later moved on to decaf (instant) which was exactly as expected.

"Croissant."

The bread of the day was the standard mushed "croissant" that is slightly sweet bread, but it was warm and not stale today, so, a bit better than is often served on these flights.  **+.

"Ricotta Pancakes."

"with mascarpone cheese, blueberry compote, and maple syrup."

I had to laugh when I saw the "pancakes", as described by both the menu and the flight attendant.  But this was a "bank favor in your honor" incident for me, as I wasn't particularly excited about the pancakes (generally thin, limp, lackluster on flights), I had just ordered them because I didn't want the fritatta at all, and I *do* both love liege waffles, and I've had some actually very good versions on flights (a decent version on Japan Airlines first class, fabulous British Airways First Class pecan waffles with sautéed bananas and cinnamon honey, and great ones from Cathay Pacific, which also came with berry compote and mascarpone).

I can safely say this is the best United breakfast I think I've ever had.  Now, that said, the bar is very, very low.  United is clearly not known for the catering in general, but in particular, the breakfast is usually abysmal.  The "croissant" obviously gets its fair share of scorn, as do the assorted versions of odd green egg mounds and low quality sausage, and I hate the Ciobani yogurt served on flights out of the US, so, take that into account of course.  I wouldn't go as far as to say this was even a "good" breakfast, but, certainly the best I've had with United, which means I didn't actively hate it, and move on to something I had brought with me instead.   

The disappointing aspect was the texture.  Liege waffles are characterized in part by having a crispy exterior.  These were quite soft.  No pearl sugar caramelization on the outside.  But, the flavor of the base waffle was decent, and even if it didn't look particularly appealing, ***.

I did like both the blueberry compote and the melted, somewhat broken, mascarpone cheese sauce (assuming that is what it really was? I didn't really taste mascarpone, but, it was a cream of a kind).  I added my own fresh berries and that was better, but, the compote was absolutely acceptable.  There was no syrup as described by the menu, but it wasn't needed, the other components were sweet enough.  ***+ toppings.

This would have been much better if the waffles weren't soft, and if the sauces were served with a bit more care (and I would have preferred separate, and greater quantity), but again, best I've had with United with no question.  *** overall.

Update Review, November 2023

Flight 870 SYD-SFO

Seat 3L

Aircraft 777-300ER

Departure: Sydney 2:00pm (scheduled)

Arrival: San Francisco 8:45am (scheduled) 

The start of this flight was pretty smooth.  Pre-boarding started exactly at 1:10pm as planned.  Passengers were well behaved.  We had completed boarding by 1:37pm.  Detached from the jetbridge a moment before our 2pm departure.  Reasonable short wait after that.

My crew was SF based, and not the friendliest.  Mattress pads were only loaded for a few passengers, and given to 1Ks only.  Only XL pajamas loaded, and the ones that were were all ... wet.  PDB was sparkling wine only, not even water.  They did basic meal service, and weren't around otherwise.  Frequent scolding of customers for trying to pass by the meal carts, walking through the galley, having laptops out, not holding on to their cell phones in their hands during takeoff, etc.  

I had an odd numbered seat in the front cabin, which is always my preference (odd for privacy against window, front for lesser engine noise), although I had to take an L seat rather than A. As a right handed person, I definitely prefer the A seats for the side table on the right.  Wifi was available, but really didn't work well at all, which was particularly a grievance given the $28.99 price (yes, $28.99 USD for wifi that worked < 50% of the time).

Sleep was rough - we hit a fair amount of rather extreme turbulence (I think the pilot came on saying "Flight attendants, to your jump seats!" at least 5 times during the night, and the seatbelt sign was on more than it wasn't), the timing is always so awkward trying to sleep at 6pm, lack of mattress pad meant my shoulders were throbbing constantly and I was switching from side to side every 15 minutes, it was ridiculously cold at first and then ridiculously hot, and I had a crying baby for much of the flight in the row ahead of me.  So ... ahh.  Not very pleasant.

Menu.

The main meal served was kinda lunch, kinda dinner.  With a 2pm/7pm departure, this meant the meal was at 3:15pm where I took off from, or 8:15pm where I was headed, so, no idea what meal to really consider it.  I wasn't particularly hungry either, having eaten in both the Air New Zealand and Singapore Airlines lounges.

The meal lineup was pretty similar to my last flight on this route, with some slight changes:

Salad: Mesclun Salad

Appetizer: Choice of Coronation Salmon or Buffalo Mozzarella

Entree: Fairly standard choice of beef, chicken, fish, or a fairly unique vegetarian choice, Impossible Aussie pie turnover.

Main meal (including appetizer), and breakfast, orders were taken before takeoff.  Everyone was asked their second choice.  I had pre-ordered my main, and went for the Aussie pie turnover, as it actually sounded interesting, and I had such a poor experience with the barramundi last time I flew this route.  That said, I was tempted by the prawn and lobster bisque sauce that came with the barramundi, and by the creamed corn and chive potato mash with the chicken.

One change from the last time I flew this route was a choice of appetizer, although one option was exactly the same.  Breakfast was reduced down to only two options, it was three a year ago.

Aha, Nuts.

Drink orders were not taken in advance, the beverage service was done from a cart once underway.  Warm nuts (almonds, cashews only, not really salted) were served with the drinks.  I was pleased to receive a whole can of sparkling Aha without asking.

Random Red Wine.

The wines available did not match the wine list.  As the FA said, "We get random wines every time out of Sydney.  We never know what we'll get.  Each cart has different wine too."  Well, ok.  The only red wine that matched the list was the Penfolds shiraz.  I decided to try something else, a french red that I didn't catch the name nor varietal of, as I was a bit sick of shiraz after drinking it basically daily for my two weeks in Australia.  

It was a highly inoffensive wine, but not particularly interesting.  Not very big, not very bold, not very complex, but at least it wasn't too high in the acid.  I wouldn't get it again, but it was fine to drink at the time. ***.

Main Meal.

The meal is served all at once, bread, salad, appetizer, and main.  

Seeded Roll.

There was no choice of bread, just a single seeded roll.  My outgoing flight had no choice either, but was the slightly more interesting garlic bread and pretzel roll.  The roll was not really all that warm, but I did like the seeds.  It was reasonably fresh.  The same roll was served when I took this flight last year.  ***.

Mesclun Salad.

"with fennel, orange and cherry tomatoes."

The salad was exactly the same as a year ago, a base of somewhat limp mesclun.  Not nearly as fresh as other United flights I've been on recently where I was actually impressed with the quality of the salad.  Mine had a single cherry tomato cut in half, and two segments of orange.  No fennel as described.  Packaged french vinaigrette on the side.

This was a fairly boring and not particularly fresh tasting salad, but I used it in combination with ingredients from the other dishes to create a reasonable enough dish.  But, as served, meh, **+.

Coronation Salmon.

"with butter lettuce, cilantro and vadouvan seasonings."

For my starter, I went for the coronation salmon, as I did quasi-enjoy it last time.  It was similar to before, although I liked it less.  It had a base of large hunks of butter lettuce, that was actually fairly fresh and crisp, and really augmented the other salad well.  As before, it was drowned in the dressing, creamy, and vadouvan spiced.  It also had bits of crispy crunchy celery that I enjoyed.  The salmon however was a very very meager portion, I think I had just two tiny pieces, and both were fairly overcooked, dry and firm, and a bit fishy.  Really, not very good salmon at all, obvious even with all the dressing to mask it.  It didn't seem to have the fruit component that I remember from last time.

I still used it all in combination with the side salad to make a more interesting salad overall, but it really wasn't very good.  **+.

Impossible Aussie Pie Turnover.

"with watercress, sugar snap peas, lemon, and tomato sauce."

And then, the main dish, the Aussie pie, but, made vegetarian with Impossible meat, and, uh, turned into a turnover.  They certainly took some creative interpretation to an Aussie meat pie here.

The turnover was served over arugula, not watercress as listed on the menu, and there were no sugar snap peas either.  It did have a wedge of lemon as described, which frankly just seemed odd with a meat-ish pie, and a small jar of Bundaberg tomato sauce.

The arugula wasn't the freshest, a bit limp, but I was happy to use the arugula to create a more more robust salad base along with the salad and the butter lettuce from the appetizer, and the lemon was nice to drizzle on the salmon anyway.  

The turnover was fairly attractive, and a nice small meal, appropriate for the oddly timed flight, but certainly wouldn't fill you up if you were expecting a full dinner.  It was warm and lightly crispy outside. The pastry was fine, not remarkable, but not bad.  

Impossible Aussie Pie Turnover: Inside.

The filling was kinda a big lump of clearly fake ground meat.  It was kinda ... paste-like.  The texture was just odd, as was the flavor. I couldn't really pinpoint what was off about it, but, something was.  No particular spicing either.

Overall, yes, this was interesting, creative, and a nice change from the usual vegetarian pastas, but it was really quite dry, tasted odd, and needed a more interesting sauce than the tomato sauce (at least for me).  Gravy or chutney would go a long way.   To make it a real main dish, they really should have included the mashed potatoes that the salmon and beef came with, and perhaps some mushy peas.  

I wouldn't get this again. **+, bordering on *** because the pastry itself was fine.

Port.

After everyone finished the meal, the cart was back, offering cheese & crackers, the same apple crumble bars I had a year ago, and of course, the signature ice cream sundeas.

The port I did enjoy with my dessert.  I didn't see the brand, but it was an individual tiny bottle that they poured for me.  ***+.

Ice cream sundae: caramel, strawberry, almonds, whip.

Sundae toppings today where chocolate or caramel sauce, strawberries, almond flakes, whipped cream, and maraschino cherries.

This ... was the worst United ice cream sundae I've had.  I usually do actually think the ice cream base is decent (at least, ex-US and domestically), and I usually really like the caramel.  But this time, the ice cream was very blah (although served at proper temperature), the caramel wasn't warm and was just generic sweet.  I was excited to see fresh strawberries, but they turned out to be more like stewed strawberries in goo.  The whipped cream was fine, as were the almonds.

A real let down, because I do actually generally really like these sundaes.  **+.

Breakfast Tray of Sad.

Breakfast was an option of avocado toast (I'm allergic to avocado) or a feta fritatta with chicken sausage and potatoes.  I dislike feta and chicken, so, I just went with the continental, and had my own breakfast items with me (banana bread from my hotel buffet, a chocolate chip scone from the Air New Zealand lounge, and plenty of fresh fruit).  

My tray was pretty sad - ex-SYD they don't even have yogurt or cereal (ex-US they do have yogurt, although I don't care for it as it is always sweet Chobani), and the fruit salad was dominantly watermelon, so, I had just the bread, which today was actually a roll, not even a "croissant".  

Breakfast Roll.

The roll was hard, stale, and sourdough (which I dislike).

So, United provided me sparkling water and coffee (fine, not interesting) and nothing else.  

Update Review, March 2023

Service & Amenities

Flight: UA870

Departure: 1pm SYD (scheduled)

Arrival: 8am SFO

Aircraft: B777-300

Seat: 17A (window)

Sigh, United.  We were delayed boarding for unknown reasons.  Took off late.  Yadda yadda.  No in seat entertainment was working, so I couldn't watch any movies or TV.  Woken up earlier than usual in anticipation of turbulence, required to give back all service items, put our seats upright and shoulder straps on more than a full hour before landing, etc.  Not a great experience.

Service was lacking from the moment I got on board.  While they did have pre-departure beverages, I was on board for nearly 40 minutes before offered a drink.  Meal orders were taken haphazardly - following status at first, but then scattered throughout, and I was entirely forgotten, even though I never left my seat.  Once underway, I asked about my meal, and they were confused that I hadn't ordered before takeoff.  At least they did ask those who didn't get their dinner meal choices their breakfast preferences first, and tried to honor those.

Most of the flight attendants were not friendly.  They snapped at customers who didn't have their shoulder straps on before we took off, aggressively scolded people for having laptops out while we were hanging out at the gate and not pushed back yet.  No smiles.  Lots of reprimands.  This crew reminded me of past impressions of United flight attendants, where I felt like they hated all of us, and wished we'd just go away.  (The crew on my flight from SF to SYD was considerably better - not great, but at least not openly, well, hostile?).  That said, I lucked out later into the flight when my area was serviced by the one kind FA, who offered at least slightly friendly service, although certainly nothing above and beyond.

Food & Drink

The SYD-SFO begins with a meal service about an hour or so after takeoff, and has a second meal two hours before landing, as per standard, regardless of timing of the flight (although for us, due to expected turbulence, second meal was served much earlier).  Neither made sense as meals at coherent times, so, "welcome dining service" and "before arrival", as dubbed on the menu, really do seem appropriate.   There is also a cheese toastie and tomato soup available anytime that I did not see anyone get.  In the galley mid-flight there was one kind of chips, one kind of packaged cookie, and Tim Tams.  I still wish they'd add chocolate, and something else savory (popcorn?!), to that line up.

"Welcome Dining Service"

The first meal is the main lunch/dinner.  Served around 3pm Sydney time, 9pm in San Francisco.  So, late lunch?  Even later dinner?  Who knows.  I of course went lounge hopping before, so this odd meal time just went along with my odd dining of the day.

Menu.

The menu was nearly identical to the one I had on this flight 3 years prior (see review below).  The appetizer was different, the salad the same, and 3/4 of the main dishes literally identical.   3 years apart, and essentially no change to catering.  Sigh, United.

Starters: 

• Mesclun Salad: with fennel, orange and cherry tomatoes
• Appetizer: coronation salmon with butter lettuce, cilantro and vadouvan seasonings.

There is only one choice of appetizer, coronation salmon with butter lettuce, coriander and vadouvan seasonings, along with a mesclun salad.  The appetizer was new for me.  Not listed is the fact that all meals also come with bread, no choice.

There were four options for the main:

• Seared Beef Filet: "Creamy peppercorn sauce, chive mashed potatoes, Broccolini, button mushrooms."
• Chicken Stuffed with Mint and Ricotta: "Smoked red pepper sauce, parsnip potato mash, carrot, shallot."
• Seared Barramundi fish fillet: "with tomato 'Nduja sauce, grilled green beans, barbecue tomatoes, toasted macadamia and fried capers."
• Cheese and Spinach Ravioli: "Pesto cream sauce, bell pepper, Broccolini, pumpkin."

I opted for the seared barramundi, the only dish that was different from my previous flight (different only in the sauce and sides, it was barramundi last time too).  The other dishes were literally identical, sauces, sides, and all.  Like all United flights, they catered exactly 32 meals for 32 people, and only had 6 of the chicken, which everyone else seemed to want.  They also had too few barramundi, but I think my status, r perhaps the snafu with not having my order taken, helped me secure one.  I felt bad for everyone who wound up with the ravioli, as I had disliked it so before, and the beef, that looked like it got returned mostly untouched by most.

Dessert lineup was the made to order ice cream sundae, cheese platter, or apple crumble cake.  I clearly went for the ice cream sundae, although I knew it would be slightly different from my US based flight, as I heard the FA telling others it was a different brand of ice cream.  Dessert is served from a cart once everyone has completed their meals.

Meal service was a bit slow, but that was fine given the odd timing.  Drinks and nuts were served close to an hour in, meals about 30 minutes later.  The only lag that really bothered me was the long time before I finished eating, and dessert (and I was in the second to last row, one of the last to get my meal, and still it was ages before they even started the dessert cart service).  It was more than 2 hours into the flight when I finally got my ice cream!

We were presented with a hot towel once underway, and were asked to take out our tables so they could put the placemat down.  This was long before any actual meal service started, and a bit annoying, as it made working on my laptop harder.

My meal wasn't awful, but it certainly was not great.

French red wine, nuts.

Eventually a cart came through with drinks and warm nuts.

The pinot noir was the same Acacia that I did not like on my previous flight, so I decided to try another.  I asked the FA to surprise me between the Justin Cabernet or the French red blend (that I didn't catch the name of).  He let me try both.  Neither was great, pretty acidic, but I went with the random French one.  It at least had a bit of something to it, a touch of tanin that I appreciated.  It grew on me throughout the meal.  Yes, I'm finally "growing up" and getting into bigger wines.  ***+.

The nuts were again just almonds and cashews, lightly warm, not salted.  Meh.

Meal.

As always with United, the entire meal is served at once, the salad and appetizer and bread, no choice of any of these, plus your chosen main dish.

Dinner Roll.

United bread and I have an interesting relationship.  I generally am not one to eat much in terms of dinner rolls/breads (yes, toast, yes bread pudding, but not normally side breads) in general.  And yet ... sometimes I really like the United bread (specifically, the wheat one).  But other ones, like the pretzel bread people like, I hate.  This was a new one for me, a seeded roll.  It was served slightly warm with a packaged butter on the side.

I actually liked it.  It was soft, and didn't taste stale.  The seeds gave flavor and crunch.  I used it to mop up all the sauce from my appetizer (more on that soon) and really was pleased.  ***+.

Mesclun Salad.

"with fennel, orange and cherry tomatoes."

The salad was fairly sad looking, a small portion of lightly wilted mixed greens, a single mealy tomato, and two hunks of what looked like canned citrus segments.  Packaged dressing on the side.  I quickly discarded the tomato/citrus/dressing, but used the limp greens as a base for the very heavily dressed (but strangely tasty) appetizer.

*+ as it was, but actually **+ as it was useful to combine with the appetizer.

Appetizer.

"Coronation salmon with butter lettuce, cilantro and vadouvan seasonings."

Ok.  This was, well, odd, and yet strangely delicious.  And I wasn't just a captive hungry audience, having feasted plenty in the lounge.  

The base was a single piece of equally limp and wilty butter lettuce.  United really does not do a great job with the fresh greens.  And then a very, very, very heavily mayo dressed dish.  

I'm not familiar with "coronation salmon", but, it was an adventure to eat.  Amongst all that mayo there was ... chunks of fruit.  I think little bits of mango?  Soft and sweet.  And then, crunchy pieces of celery.  I tried really hard to find the salmon element, but literally couldn't find any.  I think there might have been a little smoked salmon in there?  

This likely doesn't sound very good.  Limp base lettuce, tons of mayo, and odd mix of celery, possibly mango, and seemingly no salmon?  But when I put it over the other limp mixed greens, added some pepper, I actually really liked it.  Oh, and the dressing was vadouvan based, and quite flavorful.

I later looked this up, and it seems it was their play on a more standard dish, coronation chicken, which is a fairly well known British dish, generally a sandwich filling, with cold chicken in a creamy curry base, with apricots or raisins, and almonds, originally served at the coronation of Queen Elizabeth II in 1953.  Now that I read this, perhaps what I thought was mango was apricot?  Definitely could have been, the soft fruit texture could easily be another stone fruit, and the curry dressing masked the precise flavor.

I used the bread to lap up every last bite of this strangely delicious dish.  I'm still confused as to how this was so good, but, well, I really enjoyed it.  Heavy, yes, but, totally satisfying.  ****.

Main: Seared Barramundi.

"with tomato 'Nduja sauce, grilled green beans, barbecue tomatoes, toasted macadamia and fried capers."

And then there was the barramundi main dish.  This honestly sounded great to me.  I like barramundi, and enjoyed quite a bit of it during my time in Australia.  I adore 'Nduja, and was super curious to see how they made a sauce from that.  Definitely a fan of fried capers and macadamia.  The grilled green beans and barbecue tomatoes sounded a bit odd, particularly with the other bits, but, I had hope.

The green beans were ok.  I didn't taste anything grilled about them, but they weren't soggy or anything.  I didn't really like them, but can't pinpoint really what it was.  They were a touch oily as well.

I really did not care for the barbecue tomatoes, which turned out to be cherry tomatoes that were cooked.  Not sure what was "barbecue" about them, again, no grill marks, nothing looked nor tasted barbecue about them.  And I don't really like cooked tomatoes.  Big meh to this.

And then, the toppings.  I didn't really find any toasted macadamias.  The fried capers were super salty, which was great to add salt to the dish, rather than shaking the tiny shaker incessantly just to get a few small grains.  Capers and fish are also a good combo.  

The 'nduja sauce was ... sadly not great.  I didn't taste any 'nduja.  It was very oily, and separated.  Not very good.

Barramundi Close Up.

And then there was the fish itself.  On the plus side, my portion was quite large, considerably bigger than many photos I had seen of the dish.  It was very moist ... or really, just very soft and a bit too mushy.  Not awful, but, certainly not ideal, clearly cooked longer than it needed to be.  At least it wasn't dry.  It didn't taste fishy.

But my portion was largely dark meat, either entirely dark portions, or some really strewn with veins.  I know barramundi normally has some of this, but it was excessive here.  Only one end was nice white flesh.

Overall, I didn't really care for this dish.  Meh to the veggies, sadly meh to the sauce, and eh to the quality of my piece of fish and heating of it. The dish really needed some acid, a bit of lemon would go far.  **.

Dessert: Sundae
w/ caramel, shaved almonds, strawberry goo, whipped cream, cherry.

Behold, the sundae!  Yes, I'm a simple girl, and made to order ice cream sundaes on board make me pretty happy.  This route is catered out of Australia, so has a different brand ice cream than I had on my flight over to Sydney.  The FA was very enthusiastic about how great the ice cream was.

The topping lineup was chocolate or caramel sauce, nuts (slivered almonds), strawberry goo or cherries, and whipped cream.  They usually also have chocolate chips/pieces, but they did not on this flight.  Since I wanted to avoid all caffeine in any hopes of sleeping, I went for the caramel, nuts, fruit, and of course, the whipped topping.  And yes, I had my own sprinkles with me.

The ice cream base was fine, not as remarkable as the FA seemed to think it was, but, decent enough.  I got the last one on the cart, so it was fairly melty by the time it got to me.  There was a bit of ice build up.  Overall, fine, not special.

I really did like the caramel, sweet and smooth, and the slivered almonds for crunch.  The strawberries in goo I found too sweet, definitely a rather cloying style.  Fresh fruit would have been nicer.  The cherry likewise was just too sweet, too candied.  Note to self: bring your own fresh fruit, skip their fruit toppings.  The whipped cream was fine.

Overall, fairly average, but still nice to have on board.  Other airlines have better ice cream (Air New Zealand in particular has great ice cream), but, the toppings are quite nice.  ***+.

Dessert #2: Apple Crumble Bar.

Later in the flight, when I went to use the bathroom, all the extra apple crumble bars and cheese platters were set up in the galley, so I was able to try the apple crumble as well, even though not my first choice.

It was about as mediocre as I expected.  The base was fine, a sort shortbread like soft cookie, and the crumble top was fine too, again, sorta shortbread like, but very soft, very pale.  It was sweet enough and not dry, although a bit ... doughy?  The filling I really didn't care for though, it was the style of apple filling that is basically a few soft small pieces of apple in a spiced applesauce.  Even generic canned pie filling goo I like more than this.  Just, way too strong on the applesauce dimension for my taste.  The crumble top might be nice sprinkled on the ice cream.

The lady behind me got it from the dessert cart, and asked to have caramel and whipped cream from the ice cream sundae cart added, which definitely would help, but even so, I can't say this is a winner for me. *+.

After Dinner Drink: Port.

To go along with dessert, I was offered an after dinner drink, with options of Bailey's, port, or amaretto.  The FA apologized that they didn't have more options, and lamented the loss of others, taken away during Covid, and not resumed.

The port was fine.  Not great, not bad.  My glass did have a lot of sediment however.  Not as caramely as the Air New Zealand one.  Nice alongside the sundae though.  ***.

Breakfast

The last time I flew this route, the breakfast options were cereal or an omelet.  This time was more interesting, with a choice of:

• Spinach, feta, and rosemary fritatta with roasted potatoes and chicken sausage.
• Smashed avocado toast with Feta crumbles, hard boiled egg, pickled red onion, seasoned seed mix and grilled lime.
• Fairy bread french toast.

This pales in comparison to Air New Zealand's offering that starts with fresh smoothies, then a lineup of continental items like multiple yogurts, cereals, muesli, fruit, then a passed basket of assorted pastries, and THEN your choice of main dish, but at least it was slightly more interesting.  Breakfast orders are not taken in advance, so they do wake everyone up earlier in order to do the breakfast service, unlike say Qantas where you fill out a card before you go to bed.

Breakfast Tray.

My choice was easy, as I don't like feta (or fritattas) and I'm allergic to avocado.  Plus, um, Fairy bread!  I'm sure for most Americans they don't know what this is, and the menu gives no description, but I'm well aware of what Fairy Bread is, although, not usually served as French Toast.

All meals also come with a croissant with jam and butter, and usually fruit salad, but the fruit had melons, and I'm allergic.  So my platter was carbs with carbs.  There is no yogurt, not even packaged, nor cereal on offer for something simple and fast. 

Coffee. Black.

The coffee was lower end mediocre.  Not horrible, but not very good. **.

Fairy Bread French Toast.

For the unfamiliar, Fairy Bread is a very simple dish, normally served at kid's birthday parties.  Cheap basic white bread, spread with margarine or butter, and topped with 100s & 1000s (sprinkles).  I was curious to see how United turned that into a breakfast dish as french toast.

Let's just say, um, they took some creative license here.  Calling it "fairy bread inspired french toast" would perhaps be more accurate.  Yes, it was bread, and yes it had 100s & 1000s, but, fairy bread it was not.  Nor was it actually french toast.  It was served just as is, no syrup, no whipped cream, no butter. 

It wasn't awful.  It also wasn't great, but somehow some of its not-so-good qualities made it work.  It also really was not breakfast appropriate.  This was a dessert.  Coconut fairy bread pudding-in-slice-form is the most accurate description I can come up with.  

So, what was it?  Well, two slices of bread, that were moist in an odd way.  They looked gummy, particularly on the underside, but weren't exactly.  The batter/soak/whatever it was was not a traditional french toast soak, no cinnamon, and honestly, I didn't really detect any egg either.  It wasn't pan cooked, but rather, clearly just baked.  It seemed more custardy, again, more like bread pudding, but, sliced.  The bottom was particularly soft/custardy, in a way that was off putting if you were expecting, well, french toast, but worked fine as a bread pudding dessert.

The topping was not just 100s & 1000s, but also, shredded coconut.  The coconut was unexpected, not listed on the menu, and I can imagine being a problem for those with allergies.  The coconut added a tiny bit of crunch and texture.  Overall, this was very sweet, I think the batter/soak was sweetened, plus all those sprinkles, so it certainly didn't need any syrup, although I think it would be decent with a fruit compote or something besides just the sugar and coconut.  Or really, some fresh fruit - mango or kiwi go great with the coconut and tropical theme (which I actually had with me, because I knew I couldn't eat the United fruit with breakfast as it generally contains melons, and I'm allergic.  So my supply of strawberries, blueberries, kiwi, and mango turned out even more useful than I was expecting - I put the strawberries on my sundae after dinner when I didn't really like their strawberry goo, and used the kiwi and mango with this.  Perfect!).  

I actually also had some whipped cream with me (on ice, don't worry!), and added it, and enjoyed it far more than way, but, really, at that point I was eating dessert.  If you could ever convince a FA to serve it to you with the ice cream after dinner (or just the whipped cream from the sundae cart), I think that would be a winning move. 

* as fairy bread, * as french toast, but somehow ***+ as a dessert dish.

Croissant, Jam, Butter.

The breakfast bread everyone got was a croissant, a different style entirely from the one I had on my SFO-SYD flight, which was extremely bready, very pale, and more crescent shaped.  This one was considerably better - decent buttery flavor, but not flaky or with laminated layers.  It was not too dry, stale, nor spongy.  Certainly not a real fresh bakery croissant, but ok-ish.  With my main dish being entirely sweet carbs though, I didn't find myself really wanting more sweet carbs at this point, but I bet that coronation salmon appetizer stuffed into it would make a great lunch sandwich.  So while I'm adding to my hacks, ask for your breakfast croissant with the dinner entree to make a tasty sandwich ...

**+.

Original Review, May 2020

Flight Details

Flight: UA870
Departure: 2pm SYD
Arrival: 9am SFO
Aircraft: B777-300
Seat: 17A (window)

This was, my first time, really flying United Airlines.  Almost literally.  I've done one shorter domestic flight, but other than that ... uh, I avoid it.  And I have my preferred route from Sydney to San Francisco, on Air New Zealand that I generally adore, and have reviewed many times (e.g. the AKL-SFO leg).

I could have taken my standard route, but decided to take advantage of the fact that United was flying the best Polaris offering (on the 777-300) for a limited time for the summer.  If I was ever going to like United, this would be it.  Plus, while I love the Air New Zealand experience (the staff, the food, the wine, etc), and the timing makes sleep pleasant at the time, I always suffer from pretty bad jetlag on the return.  The idea of a long day flight wasn't appealing, but I was curious to see how it really would work out.

I did find the flight attendants generally entirely impersonal, although I had one I liked.  Service style was more of a "am I done with you yet?" rather than "is there anything I can do for you?"  Literally, never asked, "Can I get you anything else?" and lots of attempting to take away my half-finished glass of water.

I also found there to be a lot more ... rules than other airlines.  Shoulder straps required for take-off and landing (ok?  At least the lap belt *didn't* have airbag and wasn't uncomfortable.)  Laptops powered off for takeoff and landing (not just closed or wifi off?)  Mandatory closing of the shades while we were still wrapping up meal service.  Etc.  It felt very rigid.

The flight did take off to a rocky start, literally, with significant turbulence for ... hours.  Our seatbelt sign was on the majority of the first 3 hours, and the FAs kept getting ordered to return to their seats.  They valiantly attempted meal service over and over again, but, it was rough when they kept getting asked to sit.

Meal Overview.

Besides the turbulence though, there were no United horror stories for me, and it matched what I expected - the hard product was great, the bedding exceptional, the food low end quality and service style, and general service was "meh".  Lower end of international business class in many regards, except that amazing bed ...

Amenities

The soft product is the first part of the Polaris experience that United rolled out, so there has been  plenty written about this stuff.  I'll just give a quick take on it all.  But yes, premium offering on the bedding front.

#allTheBedding

I arrived at my seat to find, as everyone says, all the bedding.  Made by Saks Fifth Avenue.

I appreciate the great bedding, but, when you arrive with your hands full and the seat is full, its kinda annoying.  And its awkward to cram into the overhead bins, and, um, someone took my blanket once I did so.

Anyway.  At the seat was a light blanket (super comfy, stylish too), a big pillow (*really* comfortable, zomg), a small blue cooling gel pillow, and a rolled up very thin comforter.  I was a little surprised the comforter was so thin, but, I also know flights are often crazy warm, so this didn't concern me.  It turned out to be huge, much wider than most, and I really liked it.  And the gel cooling pillow really did make a difference for the first few hours.

I also knew to ask for a mattress pad, as they are limited, and people recommend asking for one the moment you board.  It doesn't actually connect to the seat though, and I found it bunched up a lot.

There was much stuff to keep around though, and not anywhere to really put it.

I did ask for any extras as I always like an extra pillow or two (to put between my knees and to create a nest), and usually like an extra blanket, but alas, they didn't have any extras.  I was given an extra very very thin tiny pillow from economy at least.

Slippers.

In my foot well I found slippers, and they were far above average.  Really fluffy and comfy.  I loved them.

Pajamas.

I also knew to ask for pajamas immediately, available in only 2 sizes: S/M and M/L.  They were HUGE.

And not that great.  The fabric was quite comfortable, thin style so good for a warm flight, but, the pants were just elastic waist (no string) and since they were too big, they wouldn't stay up, even when I rolled them over.  No pockets either.  The top was a simple long sleeve.

Not sure why people get excited about these, easily some of the less interesting pajamas I've had on flights (besides the nice soft fabric).

Amenity Kit.

Inside my cubby I found an amenity kit.

It had all the standard things: pen, low end eye mask and earplugs, disposable toothbrush, etc.

Socks.

The socks were ... fine.  Glad to have so my own good socks didn't get all airplane, but, they didn't exactly fit a foot, all just a big tube.  I prefer the Air New Zealand (or, really, JetBlue socks).

Sunday Riley items.

I did appreciate face cream, hand cream, and a face cloth though. 

Seat

Everyone says that Polaris is a wonderful hard product, and, well I agree.   I quite liked my seat.

I picked an odd number A seat, the last one available, so row 17.  Odd seats are the ones staggered next to the window, so it was very private, the aisle far away, and I could see no one else.  Because I'm right handed the A side is preferred as the generous side table is on the right.

17A View: Hello, Engines.

The noise level at my seat however was very high, due to being engine adjacent.  I knew it was going to be rough the moment the engines were turned on.

The drone of the engines really wore on me after a while.  I tried listening to music, but, the limited music selection wasn't very appealing, and, the headphones really didn't block much at all anyway.

Entertainment Center.

The large entertainment screen is directly in front of the seat, and has both a touch screen and side controller.  

I didn't use much from it, but was quite disappointed by the very limited music selection - no individual artists, just mixed, and just one per genre. 

Below the screen was a tiny slot, only deep enough to store a menu (or hand wipes or gum, little else), then the tray table slid out under that.

There was a storage well at the floor level that was not very tall but fit my little bag with no problem, and the foot well was nicely positioned to rest my feet (once I extended the leg of the seat).

Dining Table: Full mode.

I really appreciated the tray table design.

It slid straight out for service, got plenty close, and you could still get in and out of the seat with it there.  Seriously, one of the best designed trays I've seen.

Dining Table: Half mode.

It also went into a half mode, either by flipping it in half, or, just pushing it part way in.  Super handy, as you could use it to set a few things, and still have plenty of lap space.

This was very useful in the phases between courses, where I could just slide it back in and out of the way.

Storage Cubby.

The only other in-seat storage is a cubby above the entertainment controllers and in-seat power, but it was deep enough to stash a few things, had a mirror inside, and had the lackluster headphones hanging in it.

Regular power and 2 USB were provided.

Side Table.

The best feature of the seat was the really large side table, right under the cubby.  Since I was in an odd A seat, this was on the right hand side, and I'm right handed.  It was my privacy buffer but also ridiculously handy for placing nearly anything and everything.  Laptop.  Drinks.  Items for crew to take away.  Basically, everything. I loved having this.  Again, well designed seat.

The lamp added a homey touch.

Seat Controls.

The seat controls took some figuring out.  There is a rocker that kinda controls the main function, and then 3 other +/- buttons (lumbar, leg rest, and ... something).  I definitely had to fiddle with it quite a bit.

The seat style is the kind that just slides flat to sleep, which was the setting at one end of the rocker.  It was actually very comfortable for sleep, not too firm (with mattress pad), and it didn't slope.  It was narrow though, and it was hard to sleep on one side.

It was pretty comfortable to sit in, once I figured out a good position.

Food and Drink

United is definitely not known for quality catering.  I was definitely sad to be not flying on Air New Zealand as usual as I do often love their food, but, alas, I was willing to try something new.

It was ... basically as expected . Some of it really bad, the wine better than I expected at least, and the ice cream sundae station lived up to its reputation.

"Welcome Dining Service"

Like many airlines, meal service began nearly as soon as it was safe to move around the cabin.  This was 2:40pm, and a very awkward time to dine, particularly given my lounge hopping.

To start, we were given blue placemats, and then drinks and nuts were served from a cart.  I haven't actually seen this done before - usually beverage orders are taken before takeoff, or immediately after, and delivered one by one.  As the bathroom was ahead of my seat, and both aisles had their own carts, it was pretty inconvenient, as the aisle was blocked immediately once the seatbelt sign was off.

Warm Nuts, Red Wine, Sparkling Water.

Wines on offer were a Spanish white or riesling for whites, a cabernet sauvignon and a "red blend" for reds.

I asked to try both, and a small pour was provided, and then I selected the one I liked more.  Cart service *does* have its benefits!

The red blend was very bold, but didn't seem balanced, a bit acidic and harsh though.  It was fine, but I liked the cab more.  A very generous pour was provided.  Air New Zealand definitely wins on the wine front though.

I was also happy to see Dasani sparkling lime rather than just plain sparkling water, and I was offered the full can.  

And a final nice touch?  The nuts were nicely warm.  Just almonds and cashews, no interesting nuts, no seasoning, but still, they were fine.

Welcome Dining Service Menu.

I think they realize the time is odd, so, not called lunch, not called dinner, it was called, "Welcome Dining Service".

The menu consists of a round of starters (no choice, both vegetarian), a choice of entree (yup, your classic chicken, beef, fish, or pasta, order taken before takeoff), and a vague dessert lineup.  In full:

Starters: 

• Chilled Appetizer: "Tomato, mozzarella, Kalamata olive, basil, balsamic glaze."
• Salad: "Mixed greens, fennel, cherry tomato, orange.  Served with dressing and assorted breads."

Entree:

• Seared Beef Filet: "Creamy peppercorn sauce, chive mashed potatoes, Broccolini, button mushrooms."
• Chicken Stuffed with Mintbush and Ricotta: " Smoked red pepper sauce, parsnip potato mash, carrot, shallot."
• Seared Barramundi fish fillet: "Lemon myrtle cream sauce, crushed garlic potatoes, green beans, cherry tomato, spicd coconut and chili.
• Cheese and Spinach Ravioli: "Pesto cream sauce, bell pepper, Broccolini, pumpkin."

Desserts

• International Cheese Assortment: "Served with grapes, crackers, and port."
• Signature Sundae: "Served with a choice of toppings."
• Sweet Treats: "Please ask your flight attendant for today's selections."

The starters sounded entirely boring to me (I was missing Air New Zealand's excellent smoked fish and duck options ... ), and the entrees, while they sounded promising given the descriptions, I've heard such bad things about.  Only dessert was exciting.

For an entree, I was tempted to get the beef (not for the beef, lol, if an airline that everyone says has good catering can rarely get this right, like I'd get it from United ... but the mashed chive potatoes and sauce sounded good).  I was tempted to get the chicken (not for the chicken, I hate chicken! but for the parsnip potato mash and stuffing).  I was tempted to get the barramundi, as I do actually like fish, and wanted the cream sauce and garlic potatoes, but I just didn't believe they could possibly prepare it well.  Which left ravioli, the only real "safe" option usually on a flight with subpar catering: get the pasta!  

And yes, the Broccolini showed up in not one but two dishes, and was Capitalized both time.  Broccolini, so exciting!

Desserts though sounded great, although I wished I knew what the sweet treats were, and what the sundae toppings would be ...

Starters: "Chilled Appetizer" and "Salad".

The starters also came from a cart (along with more beverages, same cart), alas, nearly immediately after the nuts and drinks.  Again, trapped unable to access a bathroom, there wasn't one behind me besides way back in economy (premium economy doesn't have their own?)

"Tomato, mozzarella, Kalamata olive, basil, balsamic glaze."

This looked horrible, and since it isn't things I like anyway, I didn't try it.  The tomatoes looked horribly mealy.

"Mixed greens, fennel, cherry tomato, orange.  Served with dressing and assorted breads."

The salad was ... fine.  The greens reasonably fresh and at least an interesting variety.  I was not into the vinaigrette though, and it was the only option.  No oil and vinegar even, but you know I'm always prepared, had my won dressing, and additional toppings.

A bread basket was offered as well, with basic rolls and garlic bread.

Entree: Cheese and Spinach Ravioli.

"Pesto cream sauce, bell pepper, Broccolini, pumpkin."

My entree should have been delivered soon after, but ... "We are sorry, your meal wasn't actually cooked.  It will be a while, I hope that is ok."

Uh, thanks?  I just hoped it came before the sundae cart, because I wanted in on that!!!  Luckily (?) for me, the FAs got required to sit because of turbulence soon after, so dessert service was not able to start, and my meal cooked during that time.

Well, this was a partial hit, but mostly not at all.

The Broccolini was just as front and center as the menu implied, two large pieces, right on top.  BROCCOLINI.  I didn't try it, not my thing.

I also avoided the red bell pepper chunks, again, not my thing.  

I really liked the pumpkin, it was well cooked, not too mushy, and went great with the creamy sauce.  Speaking of the sauce, it was a bit oily, and had broken, clearly, but it was creamy and herby and tasty.  It didn't scream "pesto" and I did expect more strong flavor, but, the herbs were nice.

But then ... there was the ravioli.  Wow it was bad.  Very, very, very bad.  The pasta was dried out in places, but that wasn't the problem.  The texture was just horrible.  It was mush.  Even the dried out part was mush.  Truly horrible.  The filling was just ricotta (where was the spinach?), and had no seasoning.  It was also mush.

So, the ravioli?  Really horrible, honestly, the worst pasta I've had on a plane, from a buffet, from ... anywhere really. But the cream sauce and squash was tasty.

I was very very glad I had prepared for the flight by feasting on dim sum and mac and cheese (mediocre) in the Singapore Airlines lounge, the fabulous pasta in the Air New Zealand lounge instead.

Dessert Cart.

And then it was time for the dessert cart!!  Oh yes.  Now, this may or may not have been the reason I was willing to consider flying on United.

Sweet Treats: Red Velvet Cupcake.

Sweet Treats: "Please ask your flight attendant for today's selections."

The sweet treats for the day were brownies, macaroons ,and cupcakes (red velvet or coconut orange).

I opted for a red velvet, just ... to try.  I was very surprised with the cupcake.  It wasn't moist, and didn't taste like red velvet, but ... I kinda liked it.  The frosting was crazy sweet, but I liked that too.  I don't know why, but I liked this thing.

Signature Sundae.

Signature Sundae: "Served with a choice of toppings."

The ice cream was just vanilla, but of course, the exciting part is the sundae, made to order at your seat.

Toppings were classic: hot fudge or caramel, strawberries in goo, whipped cream, slivered almond, marashino cherries.  No sprinkles, but of course I had my own.

I'll admit, it was pretty fabulous.  I got ... everything but caramel.

The hot fudge wasn't particularly indulgent, but it was thick, rich, and far better than chocolate sauce.  The strawberries in goo I actually loved - soft, sweet, and the goo went great with the chocolate.  I added some crumble shortcake biscuit to it all as well, and that was just perfect.

The whipped cream, slivered almonds, and cherry were standard.

I really enjoyed my sundae, particularly once I added the crumbled shortcake biscuit, basically, a strawberry shortcake a la mode and whipped cream!

Port.

And yet, the meal kept on giving.  I skipped the cheese from the cart, but I gladly accepted a pour of port.  It wasn't as good as Air New Zealand port that I adore, but it was quite good, just lacked some more sophisticated caramel undertones.

"Arrival Dining Service"

A La Carte & Arrival Dining Service Menus.

The other food option during the rest of the flight is a "anytime a la carte menu" offering the pantry snacks, or, instructing you to ask for grilled cheese and tomato soup or shepherd's pie.  If I thought it had any hope, I'd definitely go fro that shepherd's pie pie, always a favorite dish of mine, but, yeah, I had no hope.

And then, the breakfast options.  Um.  Yeah.  I've actually never seen such a sparse, and completely not customizable, breakfast menu in international business class.  But hey, at least they didn't interrupt my precious sleep with elaborate breakfast?

2 options.  The cold one or the hot one.  Both served with yogurt, breakfast breads, butter, and fruit preserves.

• Cheese omelet with Chicken sausage, Lyonnaise potatoes. Served with fruit. 
• Fresh seasonal fruit.  Served with cereal and milk.

Yes, really.  Would you like fruit and cereal or fruit and an omelet/sausage/potatoes?  And no, there was not even a choice of cereal, Cornflakes only.  Only!  No granola or anything.  But I'm ahead of myself, this detail isn't on the menu.  The menu just said "cereal".

Coffee.

And of course, coffee.  The regular coffee was pretty bad.  Harsh.

I asked for decaf as well, and was told bluntly, "it is instant, it is not very good, do you still want it?"

I was a bit surprised as the menu boasted Illy for both regular and decaf, but that didn't seem true.  Given the pushback, I gave up and didn't bother try the decaf.

Cold Breakfast Tray.

So, breakfast.  I had no interest in the omelet.  I knew I'd be allergic to the fruit (melon), and I didn't want the cereal - no choice, just Cornflakes it turned out.

I asked for just the sides, the yogurt and breakfast breads that both meals came with.  I somehow still got the cornflakes, a very full bowl, with my own milk jug (skim, Dairy Farmer's brand).  No milk options either.

The yogurt turned out to be a packaged (small) passionfruit yogurt.  I don't like that style, nor flavor, of yogurt, so I didn't try it.

I did try the "breakfast breads", which, as you guessed, no choice, just a croissant, served moderately warm, but stale beyond belief.  Served with butter and Bundaberg strawberry jam.

I was glad I had my own muffins, fresh fruit, and granola with me.  This was ... yeah.  Really, business class?