Ike's Place

Update Review, Sept 2025, Mission Bay Location

It had been several years since I visited an Ike's location.  I have had such varied experiences in the past (some great, some very meh), and there weren't historically any locations near me, so it was always a trek to seek out Ike's, which, besides loving the dutch crunch bread, I just didn't have enough reason to do.  Ok, I did have a reason, once a year, to go get my free birthday sandwich, except that the past few summers I've been on the east coast enjoying summer for my birthday in August, and thus, no birthday freebie either.

This year I did seek it out, for 3 reasons.  1) they opened a new location that is much closer, and a far more pleasant walk, to my house, 2) I realized that even if I wasn't in SF around my birthday, I could schedule my order for future, after the birthday reward expired, but still redeem it as long as I placed the order before it expired, and 3) I saw they had ... lobster on the menu now?  So I was all in, although while Ike's is reasonably well regarded, I don't really think of it being a place I'd specifically seek out lobster.  If you are curious, you can get the lobster several ways, the basic "Buddy's Fave", which is what I did, or as a Surf & Turf with steak, mushrooms, and provolone added too (for a whopping $23.95).

Mission Bay Location.

My visit was to the newish Mission Bay Location, which seemed about the same size (in my memory) to the Polk Street location.  There were a handful of tables of varying heights, lots of light from floor to ceiling windows, and a central prep area.  It was clean in the dining room, although the bathroom floor was exceptionally sticky, and left my sneakers sticking all over the floor for a while after my visit.  Staff were friendly, and my order was ready on time.

#29: Buddy's Fave. $15.95.
on Dutch Crunch w/ All the Freebies.

"Dirty Lobster Salad, American. [1230 cal]."

This may be the first time ever at Ike's that I didn't modify a sandwich rather dramatically.  I left it exactly as specified on the menu with no omissions or substitutions, opted for dutch crunch for my bread choice (because, um, really, it isn't a question), got all the free veggie toppings (lettuce, tomato, red onion, pickles, banana peppers, jalapenos), and did ask for light dirty sauce (I do love it, but find it can dominate, and I wasn't sure if this would have the regular double dirty (both pieces of bread) AND in the lobster salad mix (is that what "dirty lobster salad" is?)), but really mostly left this alone.

The dutch crunch was excellent as it should be.  Fresh bread, soft, lofty, and great crusting on the top piece.  Lightly toasted.  Slathered with the dirty sauce, which was crazy flavorful and garlicky and awesome.  The American cheese was also adjacent to the bottom bread, and was lightly melted in, and all together honestly that bread + dirty sauce + cheese was just very tasty and satisfying on its own.  I'd be happy to just eat open faced dirty sauce cheesy garlic bread pieces, I didn't even need the rest of the sandwich.  5/5 bread+dirty suace+cheese, really.  IYKYK.

Buddy's Fave: Inside.

But let's talk about those fillings, as I've had mixed success with them in the past.  I'm happy to report that all the standard free add-ins were good this time.  Fresh enough chopped romaine, well sliced red onion, pickles + banana peppers + pickled jalapeno that were all fairly standard but good, and even the tomato slices were fresh and flavorful.  These toppings were all well distributed equally throughout the sandwich, every bite had them included, and the ratios were all good.  Nothing earth shattering here, but, decent quality sandwich components, assembled with care.  Low 4/5 veggies.

And then of course, the dirty lobster salad.  This was the wildcard unknown to me, as I couldn't really find reviews of it online, and I think it may be fairly new.  I wasn't sure if it would be like a New England style lobster roll, with basically just pieces of lobster, Maine style mixed with mayo and cold (or even Connecticut style warm with mayo, but that seemed less likely), or if it would be more like grocery store deli "lobster" salad that is a mix of a tiny bit of lobster and mostly imitation crab mixed with mayo and pretty coarsely chopped up.  It turned out to be the later, and I'm not actually sure if it had real lobster in it, but I think it did have a few tiny pieces?  I also couldn't tell if that odd piece you see in the photo was some stray turkey that got in there, or if it was imitation crab meat that wasn't chopped up properly and had unrolled?  It was all mixed with mayo (and nothing else I could tell, no celery or anything), and honestly wasn't bad, but I do like krab salad, and that is really what this seemed like. 3.5/5 lobster salad, as really it didn't deliver in the lobster department, but I still quite enjoyed it.

I found this more enjoyable to descruct than eat as a complete sandwich, something I did out of necessity at first as I was dealing with an oral injury that has left me not capable of biting into things, particularly massive sandwiches like this.  I liked the lobster salad with all the veggies just as a salad basically, and I liked the toasted bun as dirty sauce cheesy bread pieces that I ate separately so I could cut into manageable hunks for my broken mouth.  Doing it that way allowed the two concepts to shine in their own ways, and not detract - the dutch crunch and dirty sauce and cheese totally overshadowed the "lobster" otherwise.  All in all, I really enjoyed this, even if not really much lobster included. 4/5.

Update Reviews, 2018 & 2019

While I'm not a sandwich girl in general, from time to time, I get a craving.  Which lead me to finally try cult classic Ike's in the past (start with my original review there!).  I still don't go for sandwiches often, but when I do, Ike's has become my place ... even though, well, every visit leaves me questioning why ...

2018

My visit in 2018 was ... not good.  I don't know what was going on that day.

I got in line at 12:10pm.  It took 20 minutes for me to even be able to order, with only 2 people in line in front of me.  It then took another 25 minutes to actually get my sandwich.  Yes, it was 12:56pm when my name was called.  For a *sandwich*.

Sandwich Backup.

The staff were clearly slammed, or, at least they were very backed up.  There was a huge line of sandwiches awaiting final assembly.

Dirty Floor & Counter.

And the place was ... a mess.  No wonder they couldn't work efficiently?  You can see all the outstanding tickets here, but also, the floor was covered in ... bits of food.

It was kinda gross, actually.

What a mess.

There were also boxes half emptied and left all over the space.  How could they all move around and work?  Yeah, they couldn't, effectively.

I guess, seeing this, it doesn't surprise me it took so long to get my order.

Pee Wee (with modifications/additions)
All The Toppings, Whole Wheat, Side of Godfather Sauce. $10+.

"French Dressing, Home Made Poppy Seed Coleslaw, Swiss, Vegan Turkey" ... "Sub Vegan Breaded Chicken for Vegan Turkey, Sub Honey Mustard for French Dressing, Add Veggie Bacon, and include Godfather Sauce on the Side."

My order was a customization of one of the named sandwiches, as they don't have an option to build your own.  But really, I wanted to create my own sandwich.  There were things I knew I wanted: for protein, the vegan breaded chicken was good before, and I was curious about the veggie bacon.  I wanted cheese, and Swiss and smoked gouda both sounded good.  I wanted the house made slaw again.  I wanted all the standard free veggie toppings, including lots of pickles this time.  I wanted sauces, perhaps the Frank's buffalo sauce, as I do adore that.  Or maybe ranch, wasabi mayo, red pesto, or the Godfather Sauce that I still hadn't tried.  I was tempted by the thought of adding onion rings or poppers.  But there was no particular sandwich that sounded more or less like what I was looking for.  I also was going back and forth between the idea of a Frank's buffalo based creation, or going really classic and bringing myself back to my college days, where I used to always get chicken finger wraps with honey mustard.  It was the later that I settled on.  Of course, there was no honey mustard chicken finger sandwich on the menu.  And I still wanted the slaw.

So, I made a very modified custom sandwich out of the Pee Wee.  I intended to get Dutch Crunch (because, um, its the best), but, they were out (!!!!).  My options were Sourdough (no way), whole wheat, or french.  As I was saying "French", I changed my mind, and opted for whole wheat.  I didn't want either, might as well pick the perhaps healthier option?

I kept 2 of the 4 ingredients, and only added one additional, that's not ... *totally* custom, uh, right?  I could have also picked the Love Triangle, and removed 3 things and added 2, or the Handsome Owl (minus 2, plus 2), but this was the one that felt easiest, replacing protein for protein, and sauce for sauce, and, well, the base price was also the lowest, at only $10.  The like substitutions did not cost extra, but adding the additional protein (veggie bacon), did.

I opted for all the standard toppings (lettuce, tomato, Dirty Sauce), plus all the other free toppings (red onion, jalapeno, banana peppers, and extra pickles), and since I really wanted to try the Godfather sauce, but wasn't sure how it would go with the sandwich, I asked for a side of that.

Godfather Sauce is a horseradish dijon mayo, basically, um, all the things.  I was provided a side container of it, and certainly did not need it with my sandwich (more on that soon), but did try it, and use it, later.  It was, well, creamy since mayo based, it had a bit of kick from the horseradish, and then had some dijon kick as well.  The dijon was a bit too strong for me, I would have preferred it mellowed out a bit, or perhaps that this just be a horseradish mayo, but, it was an interesting sauce, and I'm glad I tried it.  Probably best with something like roast beef?

My sandwich ... well, it took forever as I noted already, but also, it was a rather soggy disaster.  I ate it immediately, in the shop, so this wasn't a case where it suffered in transit.  It also wasn't entirely my correct order, but, I didn't bother try to get it replaced.

So, so, so soggy!

The biggest problem was ... it was just a soggy mess, just absolutely laden in mayo sauces.  I adore mayo, I love aioli, believe me, I really do, but this was just out of control.  Both layers of paper were soaked through even when I opened it literally 20 seconds after being handed over.

The poor construction really truly ruined this sandwich, sadly.  And this is why I didn't need the Godfather Sauce actually with my sandwich, there is just no way I could have had more sauce!

Modified (Soggy) Pee Wee.

So, what did I have?

Ridiculously soggy whole wheat bread, to start.  The bottom bun wasn't even still bread.  Seriously.  It was just mush.  It wasn't toasty and warm in any way, I think toasted long before it was assembled given the backup of sandwiches.  The whole wheat was forgettable.  I discarded most of my bread, eating this more as a salad.  Good thing they had forks available.

The vegan breaded chicken (Gardein Chicken Tenders, if you are curious), were ok.  Like the bread, not hot, and certainly not crispy given the pool of sauce they were swimming in.  Really a shame, as I know they do heat them, and I know they can be pretty crispy.  I do still think they are a decent product, mimicking that style of breaded chicken tender well, and, the serving was quite generous, each half my sandwich had multiple full large chicken fingers on it.  I'd get these again.

The veggie bacon was less successful, but I think that is just what the product is.  I believe it was Morningstar Farms brand (not vegan, if you care).  Not crispy, didn't really taste like bacon, not hot.  But again, a generous amount, big full slices, and it was nice to have something with different texture, even if it didn't really have any interesting taste (I was hoping for crunch and smokiness, neither of which I got from these strips).

The swiss cheese was fine, nicely melted, but of course, it was long since freshly melted, and was all congealed.  Even though I ate it immediately.  Again, I think the sandwiches were all just all backed up at each assembly station, so it was toasted long before anyone got to finishing it and handing it over.

The slaw was about what I remembered, nice to have cabbage and crunch, and it came in its own mayo base.   I liked the slaw, and would get it again, although, I think this inspires me to ask for all the sauces on the side, as it isn't clear that you need any sauce if you get this slaw.

All Ike's sandwiches are served with lettuce, tomato, and Dirty Sauce, but, mine was missing the lettuce.  Is that because they assumed I didn't want it because I had slaw?  Last time, they overloaded me with lettuce even when I had slaw, so, not sure.  I did actually want it this time, and maybe it would have helped absorb some of the sauces!  The tomato slices were again entirely lackluster, just not great tomato, although the slices seemed fresh enough, and were nicely laid on the sandwich.  The signature Dirty Sauce was ... well, everywhere?  I know they layer it on both sides of the bread, and toast it on, but it was really just everywhere.  I have no idea how, but it just took over everything.  There was soooo much of it.  Perhaps I'm confusing some of the mayo based dressing from the slaw, which was in the middle, for the Dirty Sauce, but, wowzer.  So much mayo based sauce.  I like it and everything, but, yeah.  Soggy and overwhelming.

I also added all the other free toppings, and kinda regretted it.  The red onion was fine, as were the banana peppers, but neither were necessary.  The jalapenos though I ended up really not liking, they were the pickled kind, still very spicy, but, not a taste I like, and there were lots sliced up and distributed throughout.  I asked for extra pickles since I loved them so much last time, but I'm honestly not sure why I liked them so much before.  They were just ... pickles?  Fine, but nothing special, and I didn't need that many.

So that was that.  Soggy.  Cold.  Way too much sauce.  Oops on ordering the jalapenos and pickles, cuz they took over.  Missing lettuce.  Oh, and what about that honey mustard, the inspiration for the creation in the first place?  I think it was missing too.  Maybe they just added more Dirty Sauce in its place, lol.  I really didn't taste anything else, nor see anything that looked like honey mustard, so, I really do think that was lost (unless their honey mustard is also a mayo based sauce?).

I still would want to try something like this again, but, my order would be ... no jalapeno, no tomato (I give up on their tomatoes, otherwise, yes, I'd want these), probably no banana peppers or red onion, and both Dirty Sauce and honey mustard on the side.  Oh, and Dutch Crunch of course.  But the honey mustard chicken finger with slaw concept I do want to keep working on.  And maybe I'd go for good old American cheese ....

August 2019

A year later, I still went back to Ike's.  Why?  Well, I had a serious craving for a sandwich I used to get in college at our on campus diner.  I had visions of kinda re-creating that.  Sorta.

So I returned, same Polk St location, 6:15pm on a Tuesday.

There were only 4 other patrons in the store, two groups of two, waiting for their sandwiches.  Ordering was easy, even though I was making an entirely custom thing "people do it all the time, its totally normal!", I was assured.

Ike's redeemed itself!

It did take a while to get my sandwich, longer than I expected, and it was confusing how it could really take that long ... at one point, I saw all 4 staff members working on a single sandwich, trying to assemble it.  I know they were handling a decent number of online orders, but still, it certainly wasn't speedy.

But ... I didn't mind, in the end.  I was thrilled with my sandwich.  I'd happily get exactly the same thing again, no question.

Ike's sandwiches are very large, and I found a half was more than enough for my appetite at the time.  I ate the other half a day later, which seems crazy for an assembled sandwich, but it was still glorious - I just put it open faced into the toaster to crisp it all back up, and honestly, essentially as good as new!

Custom Sandwich.

When my name was finally called, I was asked "wanna sucker?",which made me giggle a little, and yes, I accepted the caramel apple sucker.  I know Ike's is a big chain now, but I'm glad they have kept some little touches like this.

You can see I also learned from my past notes, and got my sauce (well, one of them) on the side.  This was no problem.

For my creation, I basically knew what I wanted ... but I wasn't sure how to order it.  That said, I know Ike's will make you anything you want, if they have the ingredients, so I just asked the person taking my order if it was easier for me to try to tell her a modified sandwich, or to just tell her what I wanted - as in, do I just say "I want X, Y, and Z" or do I say "I want a {Sandwich Name} but with X instead of Y, add Z, etc."  She just said, "it depends, let's figure it out.  What do you want?"  I was really thrilled with how easy she made the experience, when I thought I was going to be super annoying.

What I wanted?  Vegan breaded chicken, melted American cheese, honey mustard (but on the side), dirty sauce, lettuce, extra pickles, and, um onion rings.  This is not on the menu ... at all.  But it is what I wanted!

Her solution was to order the Danny Glover, but, um, *very* modified, as I literally only kept one component of it.  She said it would price the cheapest this way, and I believed her.

So I started with the base Danny Glover: vegan chicken, BBQ sauce, and cheddar cheese ... where the only part of it I wanted was the vegan breaded chicken (my goto).  I swapped out the cheese (American instead of cheddar), I swapped out the sauce (honey mustard instead of bbq, and had it on the side), I added beer battered fried onion rings ... and then included the standard offering of dirty sauce, lettuce but not tomatoes (they are never very good), and added optional pickles (extra, in fact).

I felt like a huge pain in the ass, but she really didn't treat me that way at all.

Modified Danny Glover: Vegan Chicken, Onion Rings, American Cheese,
Lettuce, Extra Pickles, Dirty Sauce on Dutch Crunch. ($11.11 + $3).

My sandwich arrived piping hot.  I literally saw steam come rolling out as I opened it up.  This was a great sign.

As always, I liked the vegan breaded chicken (Gardein brand, I think).  I probably wouldn't really like these as a full serving of standalone chicken nuggets, but, in the sandwich, I like them quite a bit.  The texture works, and they aren't too odd in a fake meat way.  When I extracted one and slathered it in honey mustard, it was delightful.

I could have picked fancy cheeses like gouda or havarti or even just something more exiting like swiss, but I went for American, because that is what I was trying to re-create from my college days.   It was perfectly melted, and went great with the breaded chicken and honey mustard, just as I envisioned.

The lettuce I almost left off, since the past few times it has been excessive and actually decreased my happiness with the sandwich, but again, in interests of my memory sandwich, I kept it.  It actually was a totally normal amount, generic shredded iceberg, which, well, worked with my chicken finger and american cheese concept.  Simple, no frills.  I was glad I had it for some freshness.

I asked for extra pickles, but actually ended up disliking them entirely, which happened last time.  I'm not sure what it is about these pickles, but, I guess they just aren't for me.  Note to self: no pickles next time.  I didn't bother with the tomatoes as they have been so bad the past few times.

Dutch Crunch!

For my bread, I picked dutch crunch, the king of sandwich breads that I am glad I have discovered since moving to the Bay Area (did you know it doesn't really exist other places?).  And unlike last time, it was not sold out.

It was nicely toasted, crispy on the outside, super soft inside, and even more crispy due to the dutch crunch sugar/rice flour coating.  Love that bread.

It came with the dirty sauce slathered on both sides, baked on.  I almost asked for the dirty sauce on the side, like the honey mustard, but I remembered that they bake it on, and that is the magic touch.

And magic it is.  Seriously.  Herby, garlic-y, and when it bakes into the bread it just makes for ultimate deliciousness.

I somewhat deconstructed half my half sandwich, and choose to just eat the chicken and onion rings as finger food dipped into honey mustard, and the bread just with the amazing dirty sauce and some american cheese baked on, and I truly even loved just the bread and sauce.  No sandwich even required.  And I am *not* a bread girl.  It was like creamy garlic bread, if that makes sense.  All the flavor and herbs of garlic bread, but creamy from the mayo components.  A++ and being well toasted, hot and fresh, made a huge difference.

Onion Rings.

Oh, and those ridiculous onion rings I added for no reason at all (do you really need a reason to add onion rings? I mean, come on, they are onion rings!).

They were good.  Not the crispiest, so when I extracted them to eat just as onion rings dunked in honey mustard that wasn't the best, but they were great inside the sandwich, added pleasant onion flavor, and a bit more texture from the breading.  And I love the onion rings and honey mustard combo.

I'd get these again, but they aren't 100% necessary.

Honey Mustard.

The honey mustard was GLORIOUS.

A creamy, clearly mayo based version of honey mustard.  Not too tangy, just enough.  Perfect flavor combo with the onion rings and the chicken.  I loved dunking them, and my sandwich bites, into it.

I'm glad I had it on the side though, as it allowed me to use as much or little as I wanted on specific bites.  I'll certainly do that again.

Original Review, 2017

Ike's is a small-ish chain of sandwich shops, that started in San Francisco (yes, by Ike), in 2007.  To say it has been successful is an understatement.  In only 10 years, they have expanded to 36 locations throughout the state (and I think Arizona?).

The original SF location was on 16th Street, but it had to shut down after 5 years when the lease expired, and a renewal was not offered (which created LOTS of angry San Franciscans).  Ike's moved to a temporary home in the Castro, literally, inside a bakery, and then got into trouble because it is a chain now, and that was breaking some kind of rules.  Finally, they have a new place on Polk Street, which is where I visited.

Now, you might realize that I've probably never (?) reviewed a sandwich before.  I don't generally really like sandwiches.  But ... Ike's has such acclaim, and such an interesting menu, that I finally had to try it.

Oh, and they have a birthday club, where you get a free sandwich on your birthday.  You know I can't resist a birthday freebie.

Setting

Entire Shop.

The shop is fairly narrow, with not much seating.

You order at a register at the entrance, sandwiches are prepped in the small kitchen in the middle, there is a soda fountain on the side, and several high top tables for two.  There is one single lower table with 3 chairs.  I imagine when it gets busy, finding a seat is hard, or I suspect most people take their sandwiches to go, although, the neighborhood isn't really one where you want to just go eat outside.

There is no bathroom.  But they do have a hand sanitizer pump to clean your hands somewhat.

Menu.

The menu is ... daunting to say the least.  More than 50 sandwiches (even when they first opened, they had 46!).  And, they mostly all sound amazing.

Sandwiches are named after celebrities, places, and concepts, so you have to read all the details to know what is in your sandwich.  No option to order just "a turkey sandwich", although I'm sure you could do that.  The closest you can get to a normal named sandwich is the Paul Reubens, which is a play on a reuben with pastrami, purple slaw, french dressing, and swiss (yeah, I said closest, if you were expecting corned beef not pastrami, sauerkraut instead of slaw, and Russian instead of French, you'd be sad).  Many involve fried items, including onion rings, jalapeño poppers, mozzarella sticks, and even mac and cheese.  All have some kind of sauces.  These are not light sandwiches.

Each location also has location specific specials, and each day also has two specials (on a separate menu).  And of course, you can modify your sandwich in a slew of ways.

Meat options include halal chicken or fried chicken, deli sliced turkey, roast beef, pastrami, ham, and salami, bacon, meatballs, and thin sliced rib-eye.  However, vegetarians, and vegans, have nearly as many options to pick from, and they aren't just hummus and sprouts.  The fried chicken is replaced with vegan breaded chicken.  There is vegan steak, turkey, and even bacon and meatball equivalents.  You can also opt for breaded fried eggplant, or yes, hummus, if you don't go for the fake proteins.  There is vegan cheese and vegan aioli offered.  Sandwiches that aren't vegan by design, but can be made vegan, have a marking on the menu.

Dutch crunch is the standard bread offering ("World Famous", they say, and about 70% of people opt for it), but you can also select from french, sourdough, whole wheat, or gluten free bread.  All the breads are huge grinder rolls, not sliced bread, and only in one, very large, size.

All sandwiches come with lettuce, tomato, and Dirty Sauce by default.  The "Dirty Sauce" is Ike's secret ingredient, a garlic aioli (normally mayo based, but they also make an egg-free vegan version), that they toast right into the bread, on both sides, under your cheese and meat choices.  And then they add another layer after toasting.  Um, yeah, these aren't light sandwiches.

You can also add red onion, pickles, banana peppers, and jalapeños for free.

On top of that, there are lots of other add-ons, like spinach or cucumbers (for $1), avocado or bacon ($2.50), cheese ($1.50), mushrooms ($2), any of the sauces ($1-2, depending on the sauce), double meat ($2), halal chicken (instead of fried, $1), or, for the really crazy, beer battered onion rings or beer battered zucchini ($3), stuffed jalapeño poppers or mozzarella sticks ($3.50).

I was fatigued just reading the menu.  But when I realized that I'd be happy with any of at least 10 different choices, that actually made it easier.  It seemed hard to go wrong.  Interestingly, everything I wanted was vegetarian.  I think mostly because I was excited by the fake chicken and turkey, since I don't like the real stuff.

In the end, I narrowed down to a handful: 1) The "Danny Glover" with BBQ Sauce, Cheddar, and Vegan Breaded Chicken, 2) The "Handsome Owl" with Swiss, Teriyaki, Vegan Breaded Chicken, and Wasabi Mayo, 3) The "Chased & Confused (SF Exclusive)" with Bacon, Flaming Hot Cheetos, Ranch, Red Pesto, Stuffed Jalapeño Poppers, 4) The "Pee Wee" with French Dressing, Home Made Poppy Seed Coleslaw, Swiss, Vegan Turkey, or either of the weekend specials, "The Love Shaq" or "The Turner", both featuring, uh, mac and cheese (the former with american/bacon/dirty sauce, the later with bbq/honey mustard/honey).

I ruled out the mac and cheese options, and the Chased & Confused (although, really, Flaming Hot Cheetos and stuffed jalapeño poppers inside a sandwich did seem ... tempting).  And from there, I kinda made my own sandwich, using the Danny Glover as the base because I really wanted bbq and the vegan breaded chicken, subbing in a few things from the Handsome Owl, and adding in something from Pee Wee.  When you can't decide, just, make it your own?

Assembly Area.

Sandwiches are all made to order, and, they take time.  At least 10 minutes.  Because, well, there is a lot going on in each.

Each sandwich runs through the toaster, open faced, to crunch up the bread, bake in the Dirty Sauce, melt the cheese, and warm the meat.  Then there are many toppings and sauces to add.  When your order is ready, "Order Up!" is called, and you walk up to get it.  I was a bit surprised by the lack of system, no number given, no name, and everyone sorta just had to figure out when it was their turn.  Maybe they get more formal about the process when busier?

Food

Besides sandwiches, Ike's offers bagged chips (Zapp's chips, with all their innovative flavors I've reviewed before) and a couple bars/cookies.  That's it.  No other sides, not even the slaw they make for the sandwiches, nor the onion rings, poppers, or mozzarella sticks as an appetizer.  They are all about the sandwiches.

Wrapped Up ... with Lollipops!

When my order was ready, I was asked if I wanted caramel apple or blue razz lollipops.  I had no idea it came with lollipops, but, that was awesome.

It came wrapped up in two layers of paper wrap, one which actually held the sandwich and was sliced in half, and a full size extra wrapper, even though I indicated that I'd be eating there.  There isn't really a dine-in option for how it is served (e.g. no plate, no basket, etc), but if you eat there, they don't give you a paper bag to put it in.

I was surprised by how massive it was.  Length-wise, I think it was probably 10", but it was the girth that was dramatic.  Like a San Francisco super burrito, this thing isn't really meant to be eaten by one normal human.  Particularly one that plans to go out to dessert on the way home.  You can easily split one with someone, particularly if you have a bag of chips alongside, and go out for dessert after.  Or, if you don't need all that junk food in your life, a half is still a pretty serious undertaking.  I saw many people leaving with their extra half wrapped up in the paper wrapper, which, makes that seem a lot more convenient even for dine-in customers, now that I think about it.

Danny Glover on Dutch Crunch (Modified). $11.11 + $1.50.

"BBQ Sauce, Cheddar, Vegan Breaded Chicken" - Cheddar + Swiss + Tomato/Red Onion/Pickles/Dirty Sauce.

It came sliced in half, which was necessary to pick it up.  Just a half really was a full sandwich.  Check out the girth!

My order was the Danny Glover, but I made a few substitutions.  I ordered this because I wanted BBQ sauce, but, I like swiss more than cheddar, so, subbed out my cheese.  I accepted the standard tomatoes and dirty sauce, added the optional free pickles and red onions, and asked to have their well known purple slaw in place of the standard lettuce ($1.50 extra, which I was informed of at the time).  The bread choice was obviously dutch crunch, toasted.

I was surprised to open up my sandwich and find ... lettuce, the item I had subbed out for the slaw.  I had the slaw too, but, I also had lettuce, tons of it.  Very generic shredded iceberg, not particularly fresh.  My fellow dining companion noted that it took away from his sandwich experience having that much lettuce.  I removed most of it from my half.  Also generic?  The tomatoes.  Not particularly ripe, not particularly good.  I removed those too.  I think the red onion might have been left out, I never found it.

What I did find was BBQ sauce.  Tons of BBQ sauce.  It was seeping out one whole side.  It overwhelmed all other flavors.  And it wasn't possible to really remove it.  I like BBQ, which is why I ordered it, but, I actually didn't end up liking the flavor of it, even if it wasn't saturated in it, it was too sweet for my taste.

But now for the good parts.

The vegan breaded chicken was actually good.  A nice texture.  The breading was a bit soggy amongst all the other sandwich elements, but, besides that, I liked it.  Far more than regular chicken.  I'd gladly get it again.  There was a lot of it, full size thick "chicken" strips, well distributed throughout.  Most bites had a full bite of the chicken.

The swiss was nicely melted on, and again, covered the whole thing.  I loved the pickles.  Just classic dill chips, but, I really liked the crunch and flavor they added.  The slaw added a bit more crunch too, more than the lettuce, and I'm glad I added it (and, wished I had it instead, as I asked).  It was creamy slaw though, so that, plus the dirty sauce, was a fair amount of mayo-y sauces.  I did love the dirty sauce though, and, who am I kidding, I'm a mayo girl.

The dutch crunch was pretty standard dutch crunch, crunchy on top, fresh enough, nicely toasted.

Overall, this was a mixed bag.  The poor assembly that over BBQ'ed it definitely ruined it though.  I could just remove the lettuce and tomato, but, the BBQ overruled everything else.  That said, the other components were good, so I'd gladly give Ike's another chance, with another person assembling my sandwich.  I just wouldn't get BBQ, lettuce, or tomato.

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Cheetos ... from Poland

Cheetos are not exactly novel nor unique.  And I don't even like them in the US, even when they are made into one of my favorite things: popcorn.  So why, when I was traveling in Europe, and the stores were full of so many new-to-me items, did I snatch up a bag of Cheetos?

Because you see, in Poland, they had a flavor of Cheetos that called out immediately to me: peanut.  I'm fairly obsessed with peanut puff snacks from any country (Trader Joe's bamba, Osem bamba from Israel, etc), and Poland was full of new brands for me to try, like Lorenz and Przysnacki that I previously reviewed.  And, it seems, Cheetos.

Peanut.

"Get ready to embark on a flavor-packed journey that combines the bold crunch of classic Cheetos with the mouthwatering essence of peanuts, creating a harmonious blend that's both satisfying and exciting.

Our Cheetos Peanut takes snacking to a whole new level by infusing the iconic Cheetos texture with the rich, nutty taste of peanuts. Every bite offers an explosion of flavors that dance on your taste buds – the savory goodness of cheese, the signature crunch you love, and the delightful hint of roasted peanuts. It's a one-of-a-kind fusion that strikes the perfect balance between familiar comfort and delightful innovation."

The bag is orange. They feature Chester.  They *look* like Cheetos puffs, just, less orange.

I don't know if it is all those factors that messed with my brain, because, yes, even though I did taste some peanut butter, I swear I tasted an underlying cheesiness, although these don't actually contain any cheese powder.  Besides that slightly uncanny taste, they did taste much like other peanut puffs, although the flavor was a lot more muted than other brands.  I had to eat, literally, half the bag in a single sitting to get any real peanut flavor that lingered.

The form factor also set these apart from similar products, as they really were exactly like other Cheetos puffs, that is, very light and airy.  I realized I really like how much crunchier other brands of peanut puffs are.

So, overall, fun to try a non-cheesy Cheetos product, and I still gleefully devoured the bag since I love peanut puffs, but the muted peanut flavor and less crunchy nature of these make them not a repeat buy for me.  3/5.

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Sunday Morning, NYC

Oh New York.  The city with amazing culinary options for whatever you seek out, including places devoted to mastering just one single thing.  Enter Sunday Morning, a bakery that makes cinnamon rolls.  Only cinnamon rolls (although, with many flavors).  In a city known to have plenty of great cinnamon rolls, this is a bit risky, but, most certainly seems to be working out for them.

It opened in January, and the media buzz has been fairly constant since.  The place is notorious for the lines (often 1-2 hours on weekends!) and for being all over Instagram and TikTok.  Even in a city with tons of cinnamon rolls, the hype is very, very real here.  They are open daily, but not until 10am on weekends (9am during the week), which really does seem sensible, as these aren't really breakfast items.

HUGE rolls!

"​​Our cinnamon rolls are made in the classic American style. A soft, pillowy, save-the-center-for-last kind of roll."

The menu has about 10 flavors rolls every day, starting with the basic classic cinnamon rolls with either sugar glaze or cream cheese frosting, or cinnabon like with caramel pecans, but quickly gets more fun from there.  On the fruity side, there is a blueberry lemon curd version with classic cream cheese frosting, a strawberry earl grey version, or even pineapple upside down with chantilly cream.  Pistachio lovers can go for the pistachio mascarpone, and for even more decadence, there is a brooklyn blackout with chocolate pudding (!) and a bananas foster with rum caramel and caramelized banana (not that the others are not decadent ...).  They sometimes have incredible sounding specials like Coconut Kaya Pandan, Ube, or Raspberry Honey Labneh.  Flavors are incorporated either into the icing, as garnish on top, or into the roll dough itself.  Rolls are $7 - $8.50 each and are all massive, so really quite reasonable prices.

When you visit the bakery in person, the buns are right there on the baking pans, hot and fresh from the oven, often warm as they bake them continuously throughout the day.  They don't bother put them into display cases, just, huge trays of very inviting rolls that make decision making impossible.  Or so I see from photos, I didn't visit myself, but rather, was treated to them by a friend who knows my love of baked goods.

My friend visited in person and ordered 4: the classic, the blueberry lemon curd, and these two (pistachio, earl gray). He devoured the first two on site so I didn't even see them, but brought me the others.  They aren't necessarily the flavors I would have picked, but I was more than happy to indulge and take them off his hands.

Strawberry Earl Grey / bergamot tea.

I started with the strawberry earl grey, as it has the bergamot tea in it, and thus a bit of caffeine, and I generally avoid caffeine after about 1pm.  

I didn't actually really taste the earl grey - I think it is incorporated into the frosting only?  It must have been very subtle, and masked by the other strong flavors (but I could see the flecks in the frosting).  What I did taste was quite enjoyable regardless - the cream cheese icing was generously applied, sweet, cream cheese-y, classic and just yup, done well.  The stewed strawberry topping was definitely sweet but in a natural and not cloying way, and went well with the frosting.  There was a lot of topping, definitely such that this was a dessert and not a breakfast sort of item, which was fine, as I was consuming it as after lunch dessert anyway.

The base cinnamon roll was exactly what I look for in a cinnamon roll.  It was lofty, soft, slightly almost underbaked in the middle but not really, and the edges weren't dried out or hard.  Rolled with classic cinnamon sugar filling, good amount of classic cinnamon flavor.  There was also bits of strawberry incorporated into the cinnamon roll dough itself.

Overall, at room temp, there is no question that this was a very good cinnamon roll, but I didn't find it actually life changing (and not something I'd personally wait in a loooong line for).  I enjoyed it even more when I warmed a hunk up and added a scoop of vanilla gelato.

Low 4/5 - I can't really fault anything (although perhaps not tasting the earl grey if I had cared about that), but not life changing, which may just be that I've had a lot of cinnamon rolls in my life, and they aren't as exciting to me these days as other desserts that I didn't grow up with my mom making from scratch? (Yes, I was spoiled by having a mother who baked regularly). 

Pistachio Mascarpone / pistachio butter.

Next up was the pistachio mascarpone.  I appreciated that it was not Dubai chocolate adjacent, as every other pistachio item in the city seems to be trending.

I liked this one even more.  Again the base cinnamon rolls was pretty much textbook well executed - moist, soft, lofty, fresh, etc.  It was smothered in pistachio mascarpone frosting, which was SOOOOOOO good.  Such strong real pistachio flavor, and I loved the crunch from all the bits of nut.  I didn't actually taste mascarpone in this, but it did have a creaminess to it that was more than just pistachio butter.

This is definitely a roll for pistachio lovers, and I thought it was excellent (and again, even better warm with ice cream/gelato)! 4/5, maybe 4.5/5.

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Metro Hong Kong Dessert

You would probably suspect that Metro Hong Kong Dessert, is, well, a dessert cafe, likely an asian one.  Which is ... sorta accurate.  They *do* have desserts.  But they actually have a full savory menu, including standard Chinese stir fry dishes, noodles, fried rice, steamed rice rolls, baked, fried, and steamed dim sum, porridge, bbq, plus, um sandwiches (literally, an American club sandwich?) and french fries, and more.  The sweet side of things is equally extensive, with milk or fruit tea and boba drinks, smoothies, mochi, egg waffles, and sooo many puddings, stews, taro ball/glutinous rice/glass jelly based desserts, and more.

Given my love for desserts, puddings, and taro, of course I was drawn in.  The restaurant is in San Francisco's chinatown and had very little curb appeal.  It didn't even seem particularly, um, clean.

Encounter #1, February 2021

For Chinese New Year, the downtown association was trying to help revitalize Chinatown given the aftermath of the pandemic, and they arranged a crawl to several different restaurants and shops.  You got a passport that you then redeemed for tastings at the different stops.  One of my stops was Metro Hong Kong Dessert, and I was so excited for, well, fun dessert.

Chicken Wing.

The first item in my goodie bag though?  A bbq chicken wing.  Doh.  I hate chicken!

I still tried it, and the bbq flavor was actually really quite good.  But it was still a wing, and still very much not my thing.

Normally part of the BBQ chicken wings and thigh 7 piece combo for $15.95.

Mango Sago Soup (Sample-ish).

Next up though I did have a dessert item, the mango sago soup.  Served in a small portion, not their normal serving.

It was very good, but very sweet.  Basically, well, mango puree, soft pliable small sago, a few small pieces of mango.  Sweet and a tiny bit tart.

I liked it.  3.5/5.

Encounter #2, September 2025

Several years later, I encountered Metro Hong Kong Dessert again.

Assorted Goodies.

I attended a small gathering where we had baked goods from Eastern Bakery, and desserts and boba drinks from Metro Hong Kong Dessert.  I tried several items, skipping the boba drinks, and instead focusing on the "real" desserts.  Here you can see the full portion sizes.

I didn't get to try the mango pudding (front cups), but tried both of the sago soups (bigger round bowls), one was coconut juice sago, the other mango coconut juice sago.  Both were good - definitely sweet but not cloying, lots of coconut flavor, soft, not stuck together, little sago.  Not much sago, mostly just soup, and not quite what I was looking for, as I wanted more goodies, or at least, more sago to make them more like a pudding (but, to be fair, these were on the menu as soups, and they had other pudding options).  Both were very large portions, hence why myself and others split them, and the $6.95 each price seemed fine, although there wasn't much to them really.  I still did quite enjoy.  3.5/5.

Grass Jelly Taro Balls. $7.95.

For my main event, I went with an item from the Taiwanese dessert section of the menu, the glass jelly taro balls.  It had far more than just glass jelly and taro balls, as you can see here.

The base was the grass jelly.  Big hunks, pretty standard grass jelly, dark black.  You can't see it here, but there was a significant amount of it at the base.  It was good, refreshing, and not something I have often so I liked it.  Then there were black large size tapioca balls that frankly weren't very good - they were stuck together, not particularly soft.  I assume the same as used in their drinks, and I'm glad I opted to skip the drinks.  The red bean was fairly standard too, mostly whole little beans, not mashed, quite savory.

And then we get to the fun stuff.  Hunks of taro, soft but not total mush.  Taro balls and sweet potato balls that were both fairly soft and pliable, both savory too. Again, all fairly standard for this style of dessert, not particularly remarkable, but not things I have all that often.

The base broth was very plain.  I expected it to be sweetened, but it didn't seem to be, besides from the brown sugar syrup like boba pearls come in, but mostly, it was just a dark low flavor soup.  The net result is that this actually ate really quite savory, very little sweetness.  I liked the different textures, and the adventure of eating it, but didn't find the actual taste all that compelling.  I added some of the (very!) sweet mango and coconut sago soups to it, and enjoyed it considerably more that way.  Is that just my American palate so used to very sweet desserts?

Anyway, fun, and loaded with mix-ins, but not something I'd get again.  3/5.

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Pastries from Panera

Update Review, 2025 Visits

Another year, another birthday freebie treat to redeem at Panera, so I tried a new item fairly randomly, and then returned a few days later for another new item when they gave me another random free credit.  Both were average, but fun to try new things.

Cranberry Orange Slice. $4.59.

"A flavorful slice of cake with whole cranberries and sweet orange flavor, sour cream, and sprinkled with coarse sugar."

I often talk about how I don't like lemon/lime/citrus forward desserts.  And about how I dislike raisins and dried cranberries.  And how there is little place in my life for a loaf cake, a non-frosted cake.  And yet ... this year, for my birthday freebie, I chose to get just that: a citrus forward, non-frosted, loaf cake slice with dried fruit.  I was really strangely craving it, having had some really good lemon blueberry muffins a week prior, and a strangely good marble loaf cake a few days prior.  This just really called out.

And it did meet my mood.  It was moist.  The pearl sugar on top gave a nice extra burst of sweetness.  It tasted processed, and not like my mom had just made it, but not overly so.  The orange flavor was definitely the first thing I tasted, but it was a pleasant flavor, and what I was in the mood for.  The cranberries were nicely tart, and added a bit of sweetness.  All together, it was exactly what I wanted it to be, which was basically like a breakfast muffin, just in loaf shape rather than baked in a muffin tin.  Definitely not a cake nor proper dessert, but a nice morning item.  3.5/5.

Brownie Bite. $1.99.

"A mini chocolate fudge brownie topped with chocolate chips and brownie crumbles."

The brownie bite really is just that, a bite (ok, 2-3 bite) small treat.  It is covered in the brownie crumbles that are a slightly crunchy/firm style, not like a soft gooey brownie, but this makes sense for a coating, and adds good texture.  The description said it would be topped with chocolate chips too, but I didn't find those, perhaps mixed with the brownie rubble?

Since these are so small, they are also available in a 3-pack for $5.

Brownie Bite: Inside.

What is most interesting about this is what is under that crumble coating.

Yes, there is a brownie-like layer, but also ... a filling?  The description doesn't mention a filling.  And if you look at the ingredients for this, they say, as ingredient #1, "brownie cheesecake bite", yet the name of this is just "brownie bite" on the menu, and the description just calls it a brownie, no mention of cheesecake anywhere.  Yet there is most definitely cream cheese in this, and it is a very cheesecake forward item, as the entire center is a mild chocolate cheesecake.  So if you get this expecting what they describe, a fudge brownie, you'll be sad.  But if you want a bite of chocolate cheesecake with a little extra brownie alongside, this is for you.

I found it enjoyable with some whipped cream and raspberries, and would get it again if I had a free sweet treat on my account or something, but wouldn't seek it out otherwise.  3.5/5.

Update Review, 2024 Visit

Panera added a few new menu items in summer 2024, and most were a bit over the top.  Clearly trying to get attention.  Like the CinnaTops product line, that is full cinnamon rolls, topped with standard icing, and then either cookies (chocolate chip or candy chip, your choice) and more icing.  I'm all for mashups, but this didn't really seem like one that made sense.  They don't get particularly great reviews, but I still wanted to try.

Fudgy Brownie CinnaTop. $4.99.

"A deliciously crafted cinnamon roll made with our sweet dough, stuffed with cinnamon-sugar filling and topped with decadent icing, brownie chunks and finished with an icing drizzle."

Reviewers all say the brownie is the best of the bunch, and, since I never liked Panera's chocolate chip nor candy cookie as standalone treats anyway, that seemed like the best choice for me given the 3 options.

It was even more ridiculous when I saw it in person.  Yes, the base was an extremely large cinnamon roll, and it had 8 large hunks of brownie on top.

This was my first time trying a Panera brownie.  I believe this is the regular brownie, just chopped up.  Mine had 8 well arranged hunks on top.   The brownie was fairly moist, and pretty generic.  Rich and fudgey, and probably what I'd like better warm and a la mode, but I'm not generally one for brownies (I prefer blondies, or if I'm going for warm chocolate carb dessert a la mode, I prefer a nice chocolate cake as my base).  But nothing wrong with it.  Low ***.

Fudgy Brownie CinnaTop: Side View.

The amount of icing was ... um, over the top.  Er, over the sides?

Marketing Images.

For context, the marketing images show the icing on top, but not fully extending over the edges, still revealing a bit of cinnamon roll, which mine did not.  I think someone was over-zealous with the icing application on mine.

Now, getting to the base roll itself, which I was assuming was just the regular cinnamon roll I've had before a few times, however the moment I saw it I realized something had changed.  

Cinnamon Rolls: Old (left), New (right).

Yes, the base looked totally different from what I expected, and it turns out, about 5 months prior, in March 2024, Panera reformulated the cinnamon rolls, to be far less lofty and doughy.  The old ones (above, left) required proofing overnight, were baked in a pan and cut out, and were far more work for the bakers.  Now, they just bake from frozen (right).  My sources (e.g. Panera staff members on Reddit) say the icing is unchanged, which made me hopeful, as I liked the icing before.  I definitely prefer the more lofty style, but I was always let down by that element previously, so, hey, maybe this is a better change?

Fudgy Brownie CinnaTop: Cross Section.

I dug in first at room temperature, as served, but fully intended to warm it up too.

The pastry part was pretty lackluster, more of a danish/croissant dough than the puffy dough I prefer in a cinnamon roll.  It did not taste particularly fresh, even though I picked this up at 10am.   It did have plenty of cinnamon between the folds.  But, a pretty mediocre pastry really.  ** base.

The icing was the best part, it was sweet but not crazy cloying, and seemed to have light lemon notes to it?  I actually quite enjoyed the icing, comical quantity and all.  It was however quite hard.  *** icing.

So, what do you get when you put together a mediocre danish-style cinnamon roll, decent icing, and a generic brownie?  Yeah, this.  I wasn't particularly compelled to finish it, nor to get another.  **+ overall.

The regular cinnamon roll is 520 calories, and the brownie 470, so I guess it isn't a full size brownie, as this is "only" 790 calories, so I guess ~60% of a brownie?

Update Review, 2021 Visit

Vanilla Cinnamon Roll. $3.89.

"A freshly baked roll made with our sweet dough, stuffed with cinnamon-sugar filling and topped with decadent vanilla icing."

For my birthday freebie this year, I was in the mood for sweet, and was thrilled to see Panera still had cinnamon rolls when I visited in late afternoon (I got the last one!).  But uh ... I didn't like it very much.

I took a bite at room temp, and felt fairly "meh" about it, just like before - the dough was just boring, and yes it had plenty of cinnamon sugar filling between the folds, but it was just ... eh.  And the very very plentiful icing was just too sweet.

Still, I remembered liking it better heated, so I heated it up.  It looked great, the icing slightly melty.  But ... it still was just ... ok.  Not bad, but not very good, and not something worth nearly $4, or 650 calories ... (that said, now that I read my past review, I think I felt pretty similar, I just "saved" it that time by adding ice cream.

I probably wouldn't get this again. **+.

Update Review, Early 2020

Yup, yup, yet another update review of the pastries from Panera, as I continue to work my way through their reformulated offerings.  See below for all my prior reviews.

Chocolate Croissant. $3.29. (Sept 2019)

"A freshly baked, perfectly flaky butter croissant stuffed with chocolate flavored cream cheese and topped with a chocolate flavored drizzle and powdered sugar."

When Panera re-vamped the bakery goods last year, they *radically* changed the chocolate croissant.  In very non-traditional ways.

Just looking at it, and reading the description, you can tell this is not a standard chocolate croissant.  Most chocolate croissants, or pain au chocolat, are rectangular, and filled with 1-2 bars of chocolate.  This was more  shaped like a traditional croissant, except covered in chocolate "flavored" drizzle and powdered sugar, and, um, filled with "chocolate flavored cream cheese".

The pastry itself is indeed improved from the past.  It was not oily, spongy, or stale.  The outside was slightly golden brown, and had a slightly crisp exterior.  Inside was moist, and faintly buttery.

I wanted more flaky layers, more significant butter flavor, but it was certainly better than what I've had anywhere like Starbucks, or hotel breakfast buffets.

The powdered sugar on top I don't think added much (besides messy fingers), but I did like the chocolate "flavored" drizzle, as I was really in the mood for chocolate when I got this.

So, I rate the croissant itself above average, but not the same calibre as a real bakery. *** so far.

 Chocolate Croissant Inside.

The filling however is the part I was most interested in.  As I said, I was really in the mood for chocolate, and I was curious what this would deliver.

What is "chocolate flavored cream cheese" anyway?

The answer seemed to be ... soft chocolate paste.  I liked the chocolate flavor, and the consistency was good, kinda like dipping bread into soft chocolate, but I didn't taste anything vaguely cream cheese like.  That was fine with me, but if you wanted to taste cream cheese, this wouldn't do that for you.

I liked the filling, but you need to know this is not standard chocolate croissant filling, and, despite the description, isn't really cream cheese-y.

I'm glad I tried this item, I enjoyed it enough given the chocolate-y mood I was in, but I wouldn't order another. ***+.

Update Review, January 2019

Hot on the heels of my amazement last month that Panera introduced basically kouign aman to their lineup, I tried another new pastry item, the cinnamon roll, and was even more impressed.

Vanilla Cinnamon Roll. $3.

"A freshly baked roll made with our sweet dough, stuffed with cinnamon-sugar filling and topped with decadent vanilla icing."

I've been eying these cinnamon rolls since Panera introduced them late last year.  They seem to be crowd pleasers though, or perhaps hard for Panera to make in quantity, as literally any time I have arrived post 11am they are completely sold out.  I only ever see them earlier in the morning, and they usually have them still in the baking pan, with only 1-1 left.

So I finally ordered one in advance, through the app.  It was ready and waiting in the rapid pick up area.  I knew that that the cinnamon rolls are large, because I had seen them before.  I still gulped when I picked up my box to see that it was literally full from the single cinnamon roll.  I laughed remembering that this was listed under the "pastries for one" section, as they also sell these as a four-pack.  You might ... wanna split it with a friend, or at least save half for after lunch?

It also had a rather generous amount of icing on top.  I hoped the icing would be good, and, it was.  Super sweet, actually vanilla flavored, and, as you can see, plenty of it.  I really enjoyed the icing, the best element at room temperature, as Panera serves it.

Vanilla Cinnamon Roll: Side Profile.

I was impressed when I cut into the roll to see that it truly was stuffed with cinnamon-sugar filling.  There was a generous amount of filling between the rolls.  It was well rolled.  Really, a nicely constructed pastry.

I was not particularly impressed with the dough itself, it wasn't fluffy or moist as I hoped.  At room temperature, I basically thought it was better than most chain cinnamon rolls, and applauded the construction and icing, but I figured I'd hand it off to my partner later.  ***.

But first, I had to try warming it up.

It was *much* better warm.  While the dough didn't improve in a dramatic way, it was certainly better warmer, and the icing melted into more of a sticky caramel, which I enjoyed.  Totally different from the already tasty icing, but, it worked well with the cinnamon, making it more like a sticky bun.  And then I added my favorite vanilla ice cream.

Warm cinnamon roll turned sticky bun with melty ice cream?  That was a winner. ***+.

So my protip: don't bother with it at room temperature.  If you want to consume it at Panera, consider a quick trip in the microwave (every Panera has one!) perhaps, although I didn't try that.  My partner does swear by microwaving (very briefly!) cinnamon rolls and glazed donuts.

I'd get it again, but only with intentions to eat it warm and a la mode, not for breakfast.

Update Review, December 2018

Thank you Panera.  That is what I have to say.  They finally re-vamped the pastry section of the menu, eliminating or changing so many of the items I never liked.  The lackluster Pecan Braid is reformulated.  The sad Cobblestone is gone.  So is the Pecan Roll I never liked.  Also removed are the old cheese and cherry and cheese pastries, which opened up space for new additions.

They ... added kouign aman?!  (As you know, I consider this, when done well, one of the best pastries ever!)  Really?  Really Panera?  Of course I was skeptical, because, um, they haven't ever impressed me with the pastries after all, and they don't actually call it a kouign aman (because, mass market, like people would ever learn to pronounce that!), and dub it a "Brittany" instead ... 

"We improved the dough quality of our previous Cherry and Cheese Pastries, then enhanced the product even more!"

They do seem to realize though that the dough left something to be desired before.  So that is something.  The Brittany comes in two varieties, cheese, or cherry cheese, the later of which I tried.

Cherry Cheese Brittany (December 2018). $2.99.

"A freshly baked, flaky butter pastry filled with cream cheese filling and topped with cherry filling."

Well, it didn't look half bad.  It didn't look soft and spongy, and really did look like a real kouign amann.  The powdered sugar on top was appealing, as were the cherries.

It was ... ok.  Probably most would even consider it good.

The problem for me was that it wasn't really a kouign amann.  It was, however, a much better pastry than they ever offered before.  The exterior was crisp, the dough came in nice layers, it was flaky.  But it wasn't nearly as buttery nor caramelized and decadent as I expect from a kouign amann.

The cream cheese filling was a good element, a decent portion, slightly sweetened, good texture.  Nothing wrong there.  And the tart cherries were juicy and flavorful, sticky in a good way.

Really, if you just wanted a better cherry cheese danish or croissant, Panera did a good job improving this item.  But if you want a real decadent deeply caramelized kouign amann ... look elsewhere.

***+.

Update Review, October 2015

If you didn't read my original Panera baked goods review, I suggest you start there, and then return to this update, since I'm skipping the background this time around.   See "Original Review, October 2014" below.

Assorted Baked Goods!

I recently attended a brunch where someone brought a platter full of Panera baked goods, nicely cut up into reasonable size chunks.  I used it as an opportunity to check in to see if the disappointing cobblestone sweet roll was still as lackluster as before, and to check in to see that the scones were still the best baked goods from Panera.  Answer: yes on both counts.

I also tried the pecan roll, which you can see peeking out of the front right and back left corners of the platter. Described as "Freshly baked sweet dough with cinnamon-sugar filling and topped with caramel and pecans."

Sadly, it went exactly the same way as the cobblestone. It looked good. It *should* be good, given the lineup of ingredients. But, just like the cobblestone, it was really dry. You could see cinnamon, but it had no cinnamon flavor. There were plentiful pecans, but they were bitter tasting. And yes, plenty of caramel, but even that wasn't very good.

Cinnamon Crumb Coffee Cake. $2.49.

"An old-fashioned butter coffee cake, swirled with cinnamon and finished with a butter crumb topping."

Ok, so this is weird.  I don't know what happened to me.  I headed to Panera, intending to get a blueberry scone, since I recently had one at brunch and I enjoyed it.

And then I got to Panera and didn't want a scone.

For some reason, the muffins called out to me.  And of all things, the cranberry orange muffin looked good.  I don't like orange flavor!  And I've never liked a single muffin I've tried from Panera.

I was paralyzed.  Logically, I knew I'd hate the muffin.  But I really, really wasn't feeling the scone.  And I had a birthday free pastry to use.  In my moments of total indecision, I saw the coffee cake.

It didn't actually look good.  And honestly, I don't generally like coffee cake.  Heck, I don't even really like cake. But somehow it seemed like I'd get the muffin satisfaction, and have a chance of trying something totally different?  I don't know what I was thinking.  I think I remembered the really great streusel topping I had on top of coffee cake recently, and it inspired me.  I just wanted streusel, really.

My decision was made when I asked the friendly worker what he thought of the coffee cake.  He told me, honestly, that all he does is eat the topping.  He said the topping was awesome, but the cake was, well, just frozen thawed cake, and not interesting.  But he loved the topping.  Done.

So I got it.  Even though I don't like cake.  Even though it didn't look good.  Even though the streusel layer looked piddly.

It ... wasn't awful at least.  Better than I expected, honestly.  But, really not great.

The cake itself was not dry.  Nor was it moist.  It was very homogenous, non-offensive.  There was slightly different flavors in the two colors, but I wouldn't be able to identify either as anything in particular.  It was just plain cake.  I didn't really taste any cinnamon.

The topping was decent.  It was sweet, slightly buttery.  Again, no cinnamon.  It was crumbly.  But there wasn't nearly enough, which I could tell just from looking at it.  The powdered sugar on top did help too.

So, overall, not horrible, but not particularly exciting.  Not that I expected it to be.  I wouldn't get it again.

The slice for $2.49 was in line with their other baked goods.  It is also available as a whole cake.

Original Review, October 2014

Last Monday, I reviewed a bunch of scones from Panera.  The week before, I covered some drinks.  A while ago, I reviewed their bagels and mufins.  I've also covered the cookies. I'm not one for sandwiches, soups, or salads, so, what else remains?

Of course, more baked goods.  I'm skipping a real intro here, because you can read all about Panera in my previous posts.

Pecan Braid.  $2.49.

"Our pastry dough, twisted and braided with butter and freshly ground pecans coated with light sugar syrup for sweetness."

I've had a thing for donuts, cinnamon rolls, and similar treats lately.  I'm really not sure what it is, but somehow sweet bready things are just really appealing to me, particularly when paired up with a coffee.  So when I entered Panera, although I was intending to get a bagel, I didn't make it past the pastry displays.  Whoops.

I was in the mood for a cinnamon roll, and Panera makes a cinnamon roll, but it hasn't ever looked good.  It always looks kinda dry, and clearly doesn't have enough icing.  They also make a pecan roll, which looks a little too far in the other direction, coated in sticky sweet caramel.  I kinda think I'd love it as a dessert, but it was morning, so I was trying to pick a "reasonable" breakfast pastry.  I went for the pecan braid, it looked like a compromise, as it had an icing so it would meet my sweet need, and it looked sorta like a twisted donut.

I know the description didn't say anything about cinnamon, but I somehow thought that the filling was going to have a cinnamon flavor, and be a cinnamon-sugar mix with the ground pecans.  It wasn't.  It was really just ground pecans, so it totally didn't meet my cinnamon roll craving.  Whoops.  It also wasn't donut-style dough, more like a croissant dough, although not really light and flaky and buttery.  So it didn't meet that craving either.  Double whoops.

As I said, the dough wasn't flaky, it wasn't buttery, it was a bit dried out even.  It made me very glad I haven't bothered try any of their croissants, as those always look dry, and I'm pretty convinced now that they must be.  I don't understand though how it was so stale seeming, as I got it at 10am, and they said their baked goods are all baked fresh at each location every morning?  How could it be stale already?

Anyway.  The form factor for this pastry was a success, I did like how much pecan filling there was, and the way it was twisted made every bite nicely distributed.  But the filling didn't really have much going on, I wanted more spicing of some sort.  The whole thing was coated with a sweet glaze that seemed to have a bit of an orange essence to it, although I'm not certain, and a single pecan half perched on top.

Like many of the other pastries I've had at Panera, I really wanted it to be warm.  It was just so unremarkable and dry at room temperature.  I saved a chunk to bring home and stick in the toaster oven, because I was curious if it would be better.  Indeed it was, it even seemed to get more moist this way.  But it still wasn't that great, and I wouldn't get another.

Unlike most pastries at Panera, I was not surprised by the nutrition stats, as they seemed fairly resonable: 470 calories, 26g fat, 24g sugar.  Since the filling wasn't sweetened, the only sugar was the light glaze on top, so it made sense that the sugar wasn't off the charts like most of their goods.  And the plentiful amount of ground pecan explains the fat content.  An actual reasonable choice, compared to the rest of the sweet rolls, muffins, and scones.

It turns out that I'd had this once before, as I discovered some tasting notes once I went to write this up.  They read: "Icing on top not particularly good.  Kinda soggy and not flaky dough.  Didn’t pick up on much pecan.  Meh."  Whoops.  While my notes weren't identical in context, I would have known better if I'd read them.

The $2.49 price was fine for a baked good of its size.

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