Thursday, January 14, 2016

Psycho Donuts

Donuts.  Glorious, glorious, donuts.

I love my baked goods, and I love sweet carbs that masquerade as "breakfast".  Thus, I obviously love donuts.  But so many fail to impress, and I don't just mean Dunkin' Donuts or Krispy Kreme.  What I really dislike are trendy donut shops, you know the type that load their donuts up with all sorts of toppings, or crazy fillings, yet are never actually good (I'm looking at you Dynamo Donuts).  The sort of places that put bacon on their donuts, just to be cool (not that I'm against bacon!).  Really, the only decent donuts that also are gimmicky that I've enjoyed came from  Fill 'R Up Gasto Garage in Los Angeles, with their made-to-order ridiculous filled and topped donuts.

Pyscho Donuts is one of those places that sounds way too trendy to be good.  Our admin brought in 4 boxes of donuts one day at our office.  I took one look at the boxes of donuts, and immediately made all kinds of assumptions.  I saw donuts topped with giant chunks of Oreo.  I saw Rice Krispies.  I saw Fruity Pebbles.  I saw bacon.  Sigh.  I read the names of the donuts, all crazy sounding, plays on mental illness.  I looked up the establishment, to find that they call the people who work in their shops "pyscho nurses".  Double sigh.

And then I tried one.  And another.

These are damn good donuts.  I am not going admit how many I had.  Woah.

I can't tell you anything about the donut shop, with locations in Campbell and San Jose.  But if you ever get a chance to try these, do it.  I tried about ... 12 different varieties, and honestly, enjoyed them all.  Yes, I tried at least 12, which sounds insane, I know.  But these were too awesome to not try as many as possible.  The fact that I didn't try all 30 or so is a testament to my willpower!

I skipped all the basic looking ones (not that any are really basic, but I skipped all the buttermilk bars, the ones that looked like they were just regular donuts with icing or glaze, and all the ones topped with cereals).  I focused on the crazy (pyscho?) looking ones.

After reading the Pyscho Donuts website, I have my eyes on a few more varieties I'd love to try, all the "premium" donuts that were not included in the offerings we had.  Perhaps I'll have to take a journey some day to Campbell, just for the donuts ...
Four Dozen Assorted Donuts. $22.95 / Dozen.
Like I said, I uh, tried a lot of these.  I did have only chunks of some of them, once others started bringing over knives to cut off portions.  But yes, I had ... a lot of full size donuts in the end.  Ooph.  I do it for you, dear readers?  (Well that is true, sometimes, who am I kidding?  I did this for me.  All for me!)

Fung Shui
"Green tea icing with dark choco chips and a hint of vanilla drizzle. Find your bittersweet balance!"

I started with this one, as it had green topping, and that just looked cool.  This was the bar shaped donut, bottom right of the front box.  I hadn't read the descriptions yet, so I had no idea what to expect.  Would it have filling?  Did the green taste like anything?  Who knew.

It was a standard raised donut, in bar form.  Light, fluffy, not too fried tasting.  Decent.  The matcha icing was fantastic, not too sweet, a little bit bitter, and the vanilla drizzle on top of that complimented it perfectly.  I loved the crunch from the tiny little chocolate chips.  Wow.  So far, so good.

[ Side note: I went back later in the day, and had another chunk of this variety.  Still quite good, my second favorite overall. ]

Vegan Donut
Inspired by the green, I went for the next green donut, the ring shaped green donut you see in the two boxes on the right hand side.  It didn't seem very interesting to me, had no real flavor, and I only learned later that it was the vegan selection.  It wasn't bad, but, it just wasn't very interesting.

Raspberry Road Rash
"Don’t fall off the donut wagon! This donut will bring you back from the skids with cheesecake icing and real raspberry dust!"

I continued my theme of being drawn in by colors.  I still hadn't read the descriptions of any of them yet.  This one had little unidentifiable red bits all over the top (top left corner round donut, front right box).  The bits were ... raspberry dust?  I think this was freeze dried raspberry?  Either way, tons of flavor, strange texture.  I didn't taste the cheesecake icing.  I wasn't really into this one.

Strawberry Fields
"Something to get hung about! Strawberry icing, freeze-dried strawberries & a Pocky stick. Deliciousness forever!"

Continuing on the red/pink theme, I went for the Strawberry Fields.  It is in the top box on the right, left hand side, behind the green donut.  This one was a square shape, glazed raised donut, not filled, with strawberry icing, bits of freeze dried strawberry, with a strawberry Pocky sticking out of it.  It was a looker, for sure.  Again, a good glazed raised donut, flavorful strawberry icing, and tasty bits of actually identifiable freeze dried strawberry.  The Pocky stick was perhaps a bit excessive.  Great for strawberry lovers.

Kooky Monster
"A customer favorite, topped with crushed Oreo cookies and blue drizzle. It will leave you all googly-eyed & wantin’ MORE !!"

Getting braver, I moved on to the Kooky Monster, topped with massive chunks of Oreo cookie (center, front box).  It was again a nice raised donut, but this one was definitely a sugar rush.  Sweet icing, massive chunks of Oreo.  Turns out, Oreo bits drizzled with even more icing are delicious.  Do they make icing glazed Oreos?  If not, they should.

Headbanger
"Death metal knocked this guy off his rocker! If raspberry jelly filling gives you a head rush, he's your head slammin’ trauma man!"

Ok, now I was ready to move on to filled donuts.  I didn't know what would be in any of them, but hey, I'm brave.  I went for the Headbanger, front box, second on the left.

It was a classic jelly donut, again, good raised donut as the base.  The jelly wasn't really my style, it was thick and gloopy.  The icing however I didn't care for ... it was just too much sweet.  I prefer my jelly donuts just dusted in sugar.  Also, perhaps I was just getting a bit sick of sweet donuts at this point.

Unnamed
This as the one in the top left box, 2nd donut up on the right.  I had no idea what it was, and it was not listed on the website either.  It looked like it was coated in cinnamon and sugar though, always a winning combination for me!

It turned out to be jelly filled, with the same jelly as the Headbanger that I didn't like.  I did like the cinnamon and sugar more than the icing though, but, this jelly just wasn't for me.

German Chocolate Cake
"A dark chocolate cake donut crowned with our house made caramel coconut concoction! Ich bin ein addicted!"

Eventually I moved on to a chocolate donut, the German Chocolate Cake.  I don't really like chocolate donuts, but, I do like coconut and caramel, so, I went for it.  This is the one on the bottom right corner of the top left box.

It was a standard chocolate cake donut, with a nice chocolate flavor, but not really my thing as expected.  The center was loaded with caramel and coconut, tasty, but, not as gooey as I'd like.  I think this was fine, just not the style that I prefer.

Suicide Squeeze
"Designed by our favorite little league team – The Psycho Donuts. They went all or nothing with Oreo dust and dark chocolate filling! "

I went for this last, just to try one that looked much different from the others.  This was the one in the top left box, second donut on the left.

It was also my hands down favorite.  The dark chocolate filling was incredible, basically, chocolate pudding.  Sweet, creamy, delicious.  The Oreo topping this one was actually crumbs, not giant chunks, and it combined great with the pudding.  It sorta reminded me of the Dirt Cake my mom used to make.  Really, chocolate pudding and oreo crumbs is just hard to resist.  So tasty.
Boston Scream Pie.
"A donut so good that it will make you scream! Skull adorned, choco frosted, and vanilla custard filling! You’ll come a-screamin’ back!"

Ok, I lied.  I obviously tried more donuts.  For Ojan, I grabbed the Boston Scream Pie, as Boston Cream is his favorite.  If you look closely, you'll see that there is a scull on this donut, sideways since I didn't realize it when I took the photo.

Oh, and I uh, took a bite before passing it off.  It was a decent donut, again, good raised donut, filled full of vanilla cream filling.  I appreciated how fully filled it was, so many places skimp on the filling.  The chocolate icing was as expected.

Good, but not my favorite donut.
Dead Elvis. $3.75.
"You’ll think you died on the throne! Cream filled, bananas, bacon, peanut butter and jelly. It’s a hunka hunka donut love!"

The final one I grabbed was because it just looked so insane.  I didn't know what it was, but I saw a raspberry swirl, I saw what looked like peanut butter topping, and slices of bacon.  It seemed like it would be filled too.  I was pretty sold into Pyscho Donuts at this point, so, why not go big?

Sadly, this one didn't quite live up.  The donut itself was good, a nice glazed raised donut.  I did like the peanut butter drizzle. The jelly drizzle however was just goo, but, it complimented the peanut butter well.  The bacon ... was soggy, and not crispy.  I liked that it had full strips though, the other bacon donuts on the menu only have bits or chunks.  Under the bacon was ... marshmallows, a bit odd, I think perhaps to hold the bacon off the donut itself?

Anyway, my real disappointment was the filling.  I expected peanut butter and/or jelly filling, and ... it was just cream filled, like Ojan's Boston Scream.  Doh.
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